tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12486851981684384822024-03-05T16:22:59.927-08:00God's Girl DevotionalsMy journey through life with God by my side...God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.comBlogger271125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-66094675546497065622016-10-29T10:51:00.001-07:002016-10-29T11:29:23.436-07:00Will You Let Your Voice Be Heard?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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2 Chronicles 32:7-8, "'Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or dismayed before the king of Assyria and all the horde that is with him, for there are more with us than with him. With him is an arm of flesh, but with us is the Lord our God, to help us and to fight our battles.' And the people took confidence from the words of Hezekiah king of Judah."<br />
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As all of you well know, the election is coming up in less than two weeks. There are many debates that have taken place, and everyone has their own opinion about who should or shouldn't be elected. Most of us have strong opinions on the subject.<br />
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I've never been one who likes politics. I don't like debate, and I'd prefer that everyone would see eye to eye. However, with this election that is about to take place, I've found my heart overwhelmed inside about where our nation is headed.<br />
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Watching our nation that was built on Christian principles choose to go down a path that is encouraging us to take God out of the picture seems too much to bear. I've been tempted to sit back silently thinking that I'm only one voice and that what I have to say or do won't be enough to make the slightest difference, but I know that isn't what would honor God.<br />
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I picked up my voting packet this morning and filled in the bubbles on the page. I prayed God would guide me as I chose who to vote for, and I decided that although my vote seems like a small drop in the bucket, it'd be a sad reality if every Christian in America thought the same thing and decided not to let their voice be heard.<br />
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I alone cannot make a difference, but the God I serve certainly can! He isn't asking me to save the world. He is asking me to walk in obedience to Him.<br />
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As I spent quiet time with God this morning, I read 2 Chronicles 32:7-8 and found great encouragement. It read: "'Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or dismayed before the king of Assyria and all the horde that is with him, for there are more with us than with him. With him is an arm of flesh, but with us is the Lord our God, to help us and to fight our battles.' And the people took confidence from the words of Hezekiah king of Judah."<br />
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I went back and read 2 Chronicles 32 to see what was taking place in the whole chapter. What I found is this: 2 Chronicles 31:20-32:1 says, "Thus Hezekiah did throughout all Judah, and he did what was good and right and faithful before the Lord his God. And every work that he undertook in the service of God, he did with all his heart, and prospered. After these things and these acts of faithfulness, Sennacherib king of Assyria came and invaded Judah and encamped against the fortified cities, thinking to win them for himself."<br />
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Hezekiah, the king following God, versus Sennacherib, the king who thought of himself as God...<br />
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2 Chronicles 32:10-15: "Thus says Sennacherib king of Assyria, 'On what are you trusting, that you endure the siege in Jerusalem? Is not Hezekiah misleading you, that he may give you over to die by famine and by thirst, when he tells you, 'The Lord our God will deliver us from the hand of the king of Assyria'? Has not this same Hezekiah taken away his high places and his altars and commanded Judah and Jerusalem, 'Before one altar you shall worship, and on it you shall burn your sacrifices"? Do you not know what I and my fathers have done to all the peoples of our lands? Were the gods of the nations of these lands at all able to deliver their lands out of my hand? Who among all the gods of those nations that my fathers devoted to destruction was able to deliver his people from my hand, that your God should be able to deliver you from my hand? Now, therefore, do not let Hezekiah deceive you or mislead you in this fashion, and do not believe him, for no god of any nation or kingdom has been able to deliver his people form my hand or from the hand of my fathers. How much less will your God deliver you out of my hand!'"<br />
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Wow!<br />
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If you read on in the chapter, you see more of this behavior from Sennacherib. Verse 17 says, "And he wrote letters to cast contempt on the Lord, the God of Israel, and to speak against him, saying, 'Like the gods of the nations of the lands who have not delivered their people from my hands, so the God of Hezekiah will not deliver his people from my hand."<br />
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What was Hezekiah supposed to do with all of this? Judah had been invaded by a king who had no respect for Hezekiah or the God he served.<br />
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Verse 20 has the answer: "Then Hezekiah the king and Isaiah the prophet, the son of Amoz, prayed because of this and cried to heaven."<br />
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This morning, after finishing my ballot and then spending some quiet time with God, I poured my heart out in prayer about the state of our nation. There are some very sinful things taking place right now that are being categorized not as "sinful" but as "choice". My heart is heavy, and I poured it out to God in prayer.<br />
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Will my prayer make a difference? Will the cries of Christians in America be heard?<br />
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Let's look back at Hezekiah. Verses 21-22 say, "And the Lord sent an angel, who cut off all the mighty warriors and commanders and officers in the camp of the king of Assyria. So he returned with shame of face to his own land. And when he came into the house of his god, some of his own sons struck him down there with the sword. So the Lord saved Hezekiah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem from the hand of Sennacherib king of Assyria and from the hand of all his enemies, and he provided for them on every side."<br />
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I guarantee that the same God Who heard Hezekiah's prayer hears ours too.<br />
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Previous chapters before this story about Hezekiah, God gave a promise to Solomon after he finished the house of the Lord and the kings house. 2 Chronicles 7:12-13 says, "Then the Lord appeared to Solomon in the night and said to him: 'I have heard your prayer and have chosen this place for myself as a house of sacrifice. When I shut up the heavens so that there is no rain, or command the locust to devour the land, or send pestilence among my people, if my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land."<br />
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Our God is the same God today that He was then. He still hears our prayers and is looking for people who will do exactly as these verses say. We, His people, need to humble ourselves and pray and seek His face and turn from our wicked ways. We need to not conform with our nation and culture that is begging us to blend in in the name of "tolerance". We need to be a people who will stand up for what is right and true even if it means persecution.<br />
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When I say "stand up for what is right and true" I do NOT mean in an obnoxious way. The world is tired of obnoxious Christians. What I am saying is that we need to find the healthy balance of living out Ephesians 4:15 which says, "Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ..."<br />
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Will you be a voice this election?<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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My heart is heavy today as I think about where our nation is at and where it is headed. Lord, it's not too late. I pray that as Christians we will rise up and stand for what is right and true. Show us how to take a stand for You, not in an obnoxious way, but rather in a loving AND truthful way. Show us the balance between truth and love. We cannot lean too heavily to one side or the other. They go hand in hand and both need to be present. I pray for our nation to turn back to You. Forgive us, Lord, for sinning against You. Please be Who we build this nation upon again. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.<br />
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<br />God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-61870310856159481552016-10-15T13:33:00.000-07:002016-10-15T13:44:20.452-07:00Life's UnexpectedJames 1:2-4, "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."<br />
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Have you ever been going along just fine in life, and then you were hit with life's unexpected?<br />
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For Nathan and me, this is exactly how our last week and and a half has been.<br />
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It all started on October 5th when Nathan's car battery died. He got in his car to come home from work when he discovered that his lights were left on all day. Triple A (AAA) came out and jumped his car, but then it was discovered that his battery was extremely low and needed to be replaced.<br />
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He switched out his car battery, and then we went on about life.<br />
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Three days later, I was about to head home for my lunch break when I discovered that my car wouldn't turn on. I tried a handful of times to start the car, but although it sounded like it wanted to start, nothing happened. I already was feeling sick that morning, and now my car was acting up. So, I headed to the nearest place I could grab a bite to eat... Target's food court. Oh yes! I got myself a wonderful grilled cheese sandwich and Sprite. It's a wonderful combination when you already feel like your stomach is upset. Anyway, this story gets better. As I'm sitting in the food court, an older gentleman sitting at a table near me decides that he needs to spend the whole time I'm trying to eat talking to me. Not only was he wanting to talk. He wanted to talk about serious topics. He told me he was some kind of Jew... the Christian kind, and when I told him that I am a Christian and go to a Baptist church, he decided to proceed to tell me how the Baptists like to switch things around to make it convenient for themselves. Oh goodie. My already frustrating afternoon has now been heightened by a stranger's opinion.<br />
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I ended up cutting the conversation short. Not feeling well, dead car, and stranger who wants to have a debate over lunch = I can't handle this. I went back to my dead car and tried to start it once more. Still not cooperating, I text Nathan about what was going on and then went back to work.<br />
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When I got off work Saturday night, Nathan text me to let me know he was on his way over. While I waited for Nathan, I tried starting the car one more time. Still nothing. When Nathan arrived, I told him how it still wouldn't start, so he called AAA again to have them meet us in the parking lot. While we waited for AAA to arrive, Nathan asked if he could give it a shot. He got in the driver's seat, tried to start the engine, and sure enough, it turned on right away. We were shocked! I felt crazy. What was going on? So, we canceled having AAA come out and went home. I drove the car for a few more days. Everything seemed to be normal. We decided it must've been something random and went on about life.<br />
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Then Tuesday came. On Tuesday, when I got off work, I got in my car to go home only to discover that once again the car wouldn't start.<br />
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Ugh! We just did this!<br />
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After my previous experience, I decided that I'd wait for Nathan to get off work and we could deal with the car together. My friend Hannah came and picked me up. While waiting for her to arrive, my manager came out to try to jump-start my car. Sadly, it wasn't the battery. It wouldn't start even with it being jumped.<br />
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Clearly, it's been a week of it!<br />
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Anyway, when Nathan got off work Tuesday night, we both went together to try to take care of the vehicle. This time it wouldn't start for Nathan either. We called AAA (AGAIN) and hoped they could give us some answers. The man who came told us after being there only 5 minutes that it was our fuel pump. We got the car towed to our apartment and decided we'd call around and see who could fix our car for a good price.<br />
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Bakersfield was OUTRAGEOUS!!! So, we called Tehachapi, and they quoted us an amazing price. My parents had a free 100 mile tow that they offered for us to use. Things were looking up.<br />
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There's more to this car story, but I'll come back to it after I share what happened in the midst of our car catastrophe.<br />
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On Thursday, we had our 20 week ultrasound to check on baby Levi. This ultrasound was to make sure everything is developing right and that he is healthy and on track with where he should be at 20 weeks. We haven't had any complications with Levi's pregnancy. Every time we go to the doctor, we leave with a good report. His heartbeat is fast. He looks absolutely adorable (I know, I am just a little partial), and honestly, this has been an easy pregnancy for Momma (thank You, Jesus!) We did schedule this appointment with a high risk ultrasound technician just to make sure Levi doesn't have cleft lip and pallet. We got to the ultrasound believing that everything would go as before and that we'd leave with a smile on our faces and a perfect report. Before I scare you too much, let me put a clause here that Levi is still doing great! However, the ultrasound technician that we saw just about scared us half to death. For starters, she was standing in the exact spot where her head was in front of the t.v. screen, so I didn't really even get to see my baby or understand what she was talking about. She checked Levi out extensively. What I could see was that he was moving around like crazy which always makes a momma's heart be more at rest. But, the ultrasound lady was not very sensitive. She made comments throughout the ultrasound time that terrified us. When she looked at Levi's heart, she said that she was looking for three different things. She saw two of them and was looking for the third thing still because of the angle he was positioned at. My heart sank. Was there something wrong with my baby? Shortly after this heart-stopping comment, she informed us that she found whatever she was looking for. "Oh good! Thank you for giving me a heart-attack in the meantime, though!" She mentioned one other thing that made us concerned. What I remember her saying was that she saw a dot on the ultrasound. She didn't explain very well what on earth she was talking about, but all of a sudden she mentioned that sometimes that dot is a sign of down syndrome. She told Nathan and me that it was probably nothing... that most of the time doctors freak out when they see it, but the technology is so high tech these days that sometimes things pop up that are pointless. Anyway, she proceeded to tell us that if I were 35 or older or had a history of down syndrome genetically that we should be more concerned, but since I'm only 22 it most likely is nothing to be concerned about. As you can see, we were left with major fear. I asked her before leaving this question: "From the ultrasound, do you see anything that we should be concerned about." This was her "comforting" answer, "No, but ultrasounds don't tell us everything."<br />
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That was our experience with this lady.<br />
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I left the doctor's office in tears that day. I wasn't comforted that everything was fine. I wasn't able to get my questions answered. I was just left with a lady who saw me as another number and went about her day after leaving Nathan and me fearing for our baby's life.<br />
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Since Thursday, we have researched a little further what this lovely lady shared with us. From everything we've found, most people react the same way my husband and I did... shear fear and panic. The good news is that not one of the stories we found said that there was anything wrong in the end whatsoever. We did end up having a blood test done to test for down syndrome, but we are thinking it's highly unlikely.<br />
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After that whole story, the car seemed like no big deal. We just wanted to know at that point that our little Levi was fine!<br />
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To sum up our week, the car ended up starting again when we went to have it towed to Tehachapi to get worked on. My dad was able to drive it on to the tow truck. You'd think it was wonderful that the car started again, but since it started, the mechanics are having a difficult time diagnosing the problem.They fixed something that they thought was wrong but found that it wasn't actually the problem after all. Now they have something else they're going to try, and we're hoping that'll solve it. The price has gone up astronomically, and we have hit the point of deciding that God is in control of our life's unexpected. We were stressing. Now, we're surrendering and trusting that God is going to get us through.<br />
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We will find out more about the car and the blood test results this coming week.<br />
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Please be praying for Nathan, me, and Baby Levi. God is bigger, and we're going to do what James 1:2-4 says: "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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It has been a difficult week and a half. We've been facing life's unexpected, and it's bigger than us. Lord, we've had a myriad of emotions, but at this particular point, You've brought us peace and have got us to the place where we're saying, "You are in control!" Thank You that You are. I pray that You'll work out the car problem details. I pray that You'll watch over Baby Levi and let his life be exactly as You've created his life to be. Help Nathan and I trust You more through these recent trials. In Jesus' Name.<br />
<br />Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-18644695025482259732016-08-15T11:10:00.000-07:002016-08-15T11:10:35.455-07:00Surrendering Your Loved Ones to God1 Samuel 1:11, "And she vowed a vow and said, 'O Lord of hosts, if you will indeed look on the affliction of your servant and remember me and not forget your servant, but will give to your servant a son, then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall touch his head.'"<br />
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In 1 Samuel 1, we find the story of Hannah. Hannah was married. Her husband had two wives: she and a woman named Peninnah. Verses 4-5 share with us that Hannah's husband would give portions to Peninnah and to her sons and daughters but to Hannah he would give a double portion because he loved her. Peninnah had children, but Hannah was barren. In verses 6-7 we read, "And her rival used to provoke her grievously to irritate her, because the Lord had closed her womb. So it went on year by year. As often as she went up to the house of the Lord, she used to provoke her. Therefore Hannah wept and would not eat."<br />
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Here begins the story of Hannah.<br />
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Hannah longed to have a child. Her longing was so great that, "She was deeply distressed and prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly." verse 10.<br />
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Have you ever longed for something so deeply?<br />
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Throughout the course of my life, I've had various things that I've longed for. The most recent longing has been my desire for a baby. I've shared in some of my recent devotionals about that desire, and I've shared that it isn't something that has happened right away. I've only been married for six months, yet I had begun looking up infertility information because I wasn't getting pregnant as fast as I thought I should have.<br />
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Today as I write this devotional, I have some very exciting news to share. Nathan and I have our first baby on the way. I am 6 weeks 5 days pregnant! I had an ultrasound done last week, and I got to see the baby's heartbeat. It was the most precious sight ever to see that little beating heart and to know our baby is growing at the exact rate he/she should be.<br />
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I thought once I got pregnant and saw the positive sign on test that all my worries would fade away. I had been so worried about infertility that I never really thought that once I got pregnant there would be anything to worry about. However, instead of pure joy enveloping my heart, I had a myriad of emotions sweep over me. I had the pure joy of knowing there is a baby growing inside of me, but I also had the heart-wrenching fear of something horrible happening and taking that little life from me.<br />
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Don't ask me where that fear came from. Perhaps it was from hearing other people's stories. Perhaps it was from learning about "hard cases" in the pregnancy center training. Perhaps it was from sitting in on ultrasounds where the nurses didn't find what they would expect to see. Wherever the fear came from, I knew it wasn't from God and that it wasn't the reaction I should be having to such a precious blessing.<br />
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This is why I find such comfort in the story of Hannah. Verse 11 nails on the head the exact prayer of my heart when it says, "...then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life..."<br />
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Hannah prayed for a son, but her heart reveals more than that. She was willing to give her son back to the Lord recognizing that he belongs to God first.<br />
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Something that God has been impressing upon my heart is this: If I cannot surrender my baby to God and rest in knowing God is taking care of his or her sweet little life in the womb, I will be worried about them for the rest of their life even after they're born. God has been challenging me to trust Him when it comes to our baby... to surrender this baby to God.<br />
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When I hold tightly to this little one, I worry about every little thing I feel happening in my body. I feel a tinge of pain, and I panic. I don't feel anything, and I panic. It's a miserable way to live.<br />
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However, when I hold tightly to God and praise Him for this little life and surrender to Him this child's every heartbeat, I find peace. It is in surrender that I can find the joy to smile and celebrate and praise God for this miraculous blessing... this answer to prayer.<br />
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What are you gripping tightly today? If it's anything other than God, I encourage you to surrender to the Sustainer of Life Himself. Give back to God the blessings He has given to you so that you can enjoy those blessings instead of worrying about them.<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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I don't want to be a worrier. I want to trust You with everything that I hold dear. Help me to let go of my desire to control and surrender to the One Who holds my future in His hands. Thank You for the incredible blessings You've given me. Thank You for this sweet baby You've entrusted to me and Nathan. Help us raise him/her to be godly and to have a personal relationship with You. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-78661392882906354792016-08-15T10:47:00.007-07:002016-08-15T11:03:20.769-07:00The Miracle of Life(I wrote most of this devotional back in April and finished it today.)<br />
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Psalm 139:13-14, "For you formed my inner parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well."<br />
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I've written this verse out over a hundred times. At one point in my life, I was making baby booties for the pregnancy center, and attached to each pair of booties was a card with this verse on it. It's always been a powerful verse, but today it holds extra importance in my heart.<br />
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When I wrote out this verse on all those cards, I was in a different season in life. I was very much writing out this verse with the intention of hoping what it says would penetrate to the heart of those mothers facing an unplanned pregnancy. However, today this verse is much more personal to me... not because of an unplanned pregnancy but rather because of a wanted pregnancy that I can't manage to possess.<br />
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My husband and I got married just under three months ago. When we were still engaged, we joked with one another by saying, "Nine months!" In our fantasy world where getting pregnant is instantaneous, we thought for sure that nine months after the wedding we'd be bringing another Hoisington into the world.<br />
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I thought we had a high probability of instant conception. I had my husband convinced that we were pregnant. In fact, I was so convinced myself that even my physical body was confused. To our disappointment, we were wrong. I was not pregnant.<br />
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My devotional "<a href="http://taylorjasmine.blogspot.com/2016/03/when-results-arent-what-you-wanted.html" target="_blank">When the Results Aren't What You Wanted</a>" shared more on that whole process, but since that time, I've been doing more and more research on pregnancy, and the information I've found has been astonishing!<br />
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These are the percentages I found according to www.babycenter.com for how long it takes most couples trying to have a baby to conceive:<br />
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<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 27px;">30 percent get pregnant within the first cycle (about one month)</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 27px;">59 percent get pregnant within three cycles (about three months)</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 27px;">80 percent get pregnant within six cycles (about six months)</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 27px;">85 percent get pregnant within 12 cycles (about one year)</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 27px;">91 percent get pregnant within 36 cycles (about three years)</span></li>
<li><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 27px;">93 to 95 percent get pregnant within 48 cycles (about four years)</span></li>
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Another bit of information I discovered is that a woman can only get pregnant a few days out of the month. People will tell you anywhere from 3 to 6 days depending who you ask.<br />
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Lastly, there are millions of sperm fighting to fertilize that egg to make a baby and only one successfully does. If a different sperm would've made it, you would've had a totally different baby. The baby you have is not an accident.<br />
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There's a lot more scientific information concerning pregnancy that I'm not going to go into in this devotional, but if you really want to research it, you'd be amazed. Basically to sum it all up, life is a miracle.</div>
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What I've found in this journey of wanting to have a baby is that no baby is an accident. There are not "mistake" babies. Perhaps the parents weren't planning on conceiving, but I can guarantee that God was not surprised by that pregnancy.</div>
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Whatever your view on when life begins, I encourage you to take a good look at Psalm 139:13-14. Memorize it. Think about it often... and realize that the God of the universe formed your inner parts and knitted you together in your mother's womb. You are fearfully and wonderfully made! You're not an accident. Praise God that He put so much thought into forming you.</div>
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Dear Jesus,</div>
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As I've been longing for a baby, You've been showing me all the more that life is not an accident. Life is given by You and You alone. Just as much as I cannot control how long it takes me to conceive, I know that when I do conceive, that will not be by my own doing but rather by Your own hand. I pray, Lord, that life will be valued in our nation again. Open our eyes to see that we are created in Your image and to understand that nobody's life is a "mistake". In Jesus' Name.</div>
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Amen.</div>
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God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-15498018339142455662016-06-09T09:40:00.002-07:002016-06-09T09:59:05.118-07:00Embrace the Season God Has You In<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I've always been in such a hurry to get to where God is taking me next. Can you relate?<br />
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I was the little girl playing with baby dolls who couldn't wait to grow up and be a mommy. I took my baby dolls very seriously. If someone would come over and want to hold my baby dolls, I got very upset if they held them the wrong way. Doll accessories were not enough for me. I went and bought real baby items for these dolls... no joke. Nathan and I really don't need to purchase too many things when we find out we're having a baby. I took care of that when I was twelve.<br />
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When I finally decided I was too old to play with baby dolls, I began dreaming of the day I'd walk down the aisle to my one true love and we'd promise ourselves to each other for as long as we both shall live. This year, that dream came true, and I married the most amazing man I've ever known in my entire life.<br />
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I wouldn't trade where God has me today for the world, yet I find that I still struggle with the desire to get to where God is taking me next. All the while, I'm also in a new spot I've never been before... I'm caught between looking forward to where God is taking me and looking back at where God has brought me from.<br />
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My life until this point has consisted of looking forward to where God will take me next. But with the new changes that have taken place in my life recently, this year I've also been looking back. I've been looking back at my childhood and cherishing the memories I made growing up. There's no denying I love where I'm at today, but now that I'm all grown up, sometimes I miss being little. The family I once saw every day, I miss now that I'm 45 minutes away from them.<br />
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It wasn't until this year that I realized the importance of embracing the season God has me in.<br />
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As I was growing up, I thought I'd be little forever. I couldn't see past where I was at enough to realize that life as I knew it would one day change and I'd be living in a new place and starting a new chapter in my life. I spent so many years as a teenager wanting my significant other to be in the picture and worrying that God would take forever putting him in my life. I spent those years worrying instead of embracing. Now that Nathan is in my life and I've got to see how God did provide, I look back and wish that I would've spent that time in my teenage years embracing that season instead of worrying that the next season would be long in coming.<br />
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I'd like to say that I've learned my lesson, but God's still working on my heart with that one. I thought once I got married my anxiety would go away about the future. I have my man now, right?!<br />
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I was wrong, though. That anxiety just shifted onto the next step in this beautiful journey... growing our family. After nearly 5 months of marriage and not trying to prevent having a baby and still not being pregnant, instead of embracing this season, my mind automatically wants to gravitate to worrying about the next step. Instead of realizing that the same God Who brought my husband to me in His perfect timing will enable us to have a baby in His perfect timing, I jump to the worst case scenario of "what if" questions. "What if" we have an infertility problem? "What if" it takes us years to conceive? "What if" we can never have a baby?<br />
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Worry after worry floods my mind, and sometimes I can be paralyzed with this fear of something that probably isn't even a real problem.<br />
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These are my personal struggles. They reveal what's going on in my heart if I'm honest.<br />
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God's been dealing with me on this subject and repeating to me over and over the same thing He repeated to me when I was waiting for my "future husband". What He repeats to my heart over and over is this simple statement:<br />
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"Trust Me, just trust Me."<br />
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With those five words, peace envelops my heart. I can breathe in a deep sigh of relief and stop trying to control everything.<br />
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The truth is, I can't go back to my teenage years and relive them with a different attitude. I can, however, allow what I have learned through looking back at those years to change my attitude now as I look on with anticipation to the next step. I will embrace the season God has me in instead of worrying that the next season will be long in coming.<br />
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There is quote that I heard in the movie "Kung Fu Panda" of all things that has stuck with me. The quote is this: "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."<br />
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Today is the only day we get to do anything about. We each have 24 hours to choose how we spend our time and what we decide to think about.<br />
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If you're anything like me, embracing where you're at and choosing to live in the present may seem challenging. We cannot do it in our own strength. Philippians 4:12-13 is the key. "I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength." NIV<br />
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Are you ready to embrace the season you're in today?<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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As I look back with fond memories and look forward with great hope, I pray You'll still help me to live in the present. Thank You for the wonderful memories You've allowed me to make this far, and thank You for the memories that I'll get to make later that You have in store. But Lord, my prayer today is that You'll help me embrace the season You have me in today. I pray that I won't be so wrapped up in my past or so anxious about my future that I miss the opportunities You give me today to live the life You've called me to live. Help me apply the key to being content to my life... through Christ Who strengthens me. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.<br />
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<br />God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-24315609403266821242016-06-06T09:04:00.000-07:002016-06-06T09:11:17.024-07:00Beautiful Reminder<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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My husband and I wanted to add a little color to our patio, so we bought these flowers. I bought a cute little table and chair set for my birthday, and we wanted to pick up some flowers for the finishing touch. Little did we know when we bought them that they would be more than just a decoration.</div>
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Shortly after purchasing these flowers, I asked Nathan to be in charge of taking care of them. I love the way plants look. There is only one problem...</div>
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I kill every plant that is mine.</div>
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For whatever reason, I struggle to keep plants alive. So, I asked Nathan if he would be in charge of the task. He was sweet and agreed to taking care of our flowers. Every morning, I'd watch him walk outside on his way to work, look at these flowers, examine to see if they needed water, and make sure they were tended to.</div>
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Day after day, I noticed the same routine in my husband. He never forgot to water these flowers. At one point, he was concerned that the plant was dying because there were no buds on it. It was green, but the flowers were gone. I encouraged him that the plant was still alive since it was green and it'd probably just take a little more time for new buds to form. Even when he couldn't see the buds, he continued to water and tend to the plant. Then it happened. Buds galore! I'm not talking about one or two buds. I'm saying there were all of a sudden eleven buds on this plant. It started taking off.</div>
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I watched the excitement on my husband's face as he got to see the results of his continual watering and tending to this plant.</div>
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About a week ago, Nathan shared something with me that made my heart melt. He told me, "Every time I water this plant, I am reminded of the marriage conference we just went to that shared how marriage is like a cotton field that has to be tended to every day. You can't miss a day or it'll die. I'm reminded every time I water these flowers that I need to work on our marriage."</div>
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What started out as a patio decoration turned into a marriage reminder.</div>
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As I continued to think about this heart-melting statement Nathan shared with me, I couldn't help but write a devotional and share it with you.</div>
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My husband is right! Marriage requires tending to, watering, and taking care of... EVERY DAY!</div>
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If Nathan wouldn't have been faithful to water our flowers, they would not look they do in the picture above. They would've wilted, turned brown, and eventually died. New buds would not have formed, and what could've been so beautiful would've been an ugly mess without the daily tending to.</div>
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The same is true in our marriages.</div>
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It's easy to make excuses for us not investing in our marriages. Sometimes we look at them and think they're going well so we can put them on hold for a time and they'll survive. However, a marriage cannot thrive unless there is daily watering, tending to, and taking care of.</div>
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Colossians 3:23 says, "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men..." Little did I know when this verse came to mind for this devotional that just a few verses before, husbands and wives are being addressed. Colossians 3:18-19 says, "Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them."</div>
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Have you been tending to your marriage lately?</div>
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If so, I encourage you to keep it up! If not, I encourage you to begin today.</div>
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Some things I've found helpful in my own marriage to help keep it well tended to and watered are:</div>
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<li>Going to church together</li>
<li>Praying together</li>
<li>Reading Christian marriage books together</li>
<li>Being in a lifegroup at church with other married couples we can grow and learn with</li>
<li>Dating each other even after marriage</li>
<li>Finding out one another's love language and learning how to speak that love language (Read Gary Chapman's book "The 5 Love Languages" to learn more)</li>
<li>Constantly refocusing our attention to eternity instead focusing on the temporary</li>
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All of these things have helped Nathan's and my marriage. I pray they'll help yours too.</div>
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Dear Heavenly Father,</div>
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Thank you for the beautiful reminder You provided for my husband and I through what originally started off being a patio decoration. Thank You for helping our marriage thrive by teaching us every day how to water and tend to it. I pray that You'll continue to grow us, shape us, and mold us into the people You want us to be. In Jesus' Name.</div>
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Amen.</div>
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God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-23275288783917293262016-04-19T10:56:00.000-07:002016-04-19T10:56:04.291-07:00What Marriage Is Teaching MePhilippians 2:3-4, "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others."<br />
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It's been three months now since I walked down the aisle to marry the love of my life. We said, "I do!" and promised our love to one another for as long as we both shall live. It's been an amazing three months from our wedding day through now. We spent the first week of our married life on the beautiful island of Kona, Hawaii. When we were still dating, Nathan joked with me as he sang the Aladdin song, "I Can Show You the World", and he proved that to be true from the very start.<br />
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Then, we got back to our new home where we had an abundance of wedding presents waiting for us to unwrap them. We still didn't have a couch to sit on, and we had a laundry list of things that needed to be taken care of as newlyweds. Nathan went back to work, and I dove into figuring out what my new title as "wife" meant. I learned what it's like to take care of bills, wash laundry, cook dinners, and shop for groceries. My mom had taught me these things growing up, but when they became my daily responsibility, it was a huge adjustment.<br />
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Now, three months into marriage, I feel like Nathan and I have adapted to our new life as husband and wife. We've been learning how the other person ticks, and I can honestly say that the more I get to know my husband, the more I love him. He's truly a remarkable man!<br />
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Marriage has been teaching me a great deal about myself in the process. Things that I didn't even know about my character have been popping up, and I've come to realize that marriage is not only one of the hugest blessings... it also is a way in which God is molding and shaping me to be more like Him. Through marriage, God has been knocking off some rough edges on me that I didn't even know that I had.<br />
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Marriage has been teaching me many things, but one of the top things God's been showing me over the course of these three months is this: I am a control freak! The crazy thing is that I just discovered this when I got married. I have a desire to control everything. There is a certain way I like things to be done from how the apartment looks, to how meals are cooked, to how dishes are washed, and even to what direction we take when we are going places. When I was single, these things didn't necessarily stand out to me because I just did things my own way without really thinking about it. I had my own room, my own vehicle, and my own routine. After getting married, however, God began showing me that my way is not the only way.<br />
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Over the last month or so, God's been greatly dealing with my heart on my "control freak" habit, but He has a different word for what I've been describing... that word is this: PRIDE. Doesn't that sound like such a strong word? Ouch! I've thought that my way is best and that anyone who doesn't do things my way is clearly doing it wrong. This has been most apparent on Nathan's and my car trips. Nathan will be driving somewhere, and if I think he is passing the turnoff that would get us to where we're going the fastest, I'll ask, "Where are you going, baby?" One time as he was passing the freeway on-ramp that I thought we should be getting on I asked, "Aren't we taking the freeway?" and as he passed it, I stated (with a prideful tone), "Well, apparently not." That may have been the first moment of realization I had that I had an issue in this area. I have a very mellow husband who honestly puts up with way more than I ever would, and he laughed about this in that moment while still gently pointing out how I came across. That moment left an impact for me, and I started paying attention to all the times I do things like this. It's seriously on a daily basis. Yikes!<br />
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I wish I could say that I've completely conquered this pride issue, but I still have a long way to go. Pray for me! This is how ridiculous this whole pride thing is. I don't know anything about cars. Zip, nada, nothing. I can't even change out my own windshield wipers. Okay, so the other day we were at an auto store because we needed to get new tires on Nathan's car. While we were there, we went to pick up the things we would need to change the oil in his and my car. As we were looking at the oil and the filters and all the things we need to conquer this task, I began (once again) inserting my opinion of how I thought it'd probably be better for us to just take the cars into the shop to have the oil changed. I stated that for the extra ten dollars we'd be spending we could just have someone do it for us and we wouldn't have to bother with all of it. I watched the countenance of my husband drop. Once again, it was a moment where I realized I was trying to be in control of everything, and I needed to back off and allow this to be an area that Nathan got to be in control of.<br />
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Now, I have a husband who loves and respects me, and thankfully, even when I write devotionals like this that completely tell on myself, he will look and me and graciously tell me things that make me feel completely let off the hook like, "Baby, I think it's funny when you do that." or "I want to know your opinion." It makes it a whole lot easier to be open with you knowing that I'm completely safe in sharing all this. However, I still, by God's conviction, am realizing that I do have a pride issue, and it's something that He is chiseling off of me a little bit at a time.<br />
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The Bible has a great deal to say about pride, and it clearly shows that it's not a character trait that honors God.<br />
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Proverbs 16:18 says, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall." Mark 7:20b-23 is pretty humbling when it says, "... What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, <i>pride</i>, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person." (italics mine). When pride is listed with all those other sins, it makes me realize how horrible it is! Lastly, Proverbs 8:13 says, "The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil. Pride and arrogance and the way of evil and perverted speech I hate."<br />
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Clearly, pride is a problem! It is sin, and it needs to be dealt with.<br />
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As I look at Philippians 2:3-4, it challenges me. It doesn't make me want to look down on myself and believe that I'm nothing. It does, however challenge me to have a right view of myself and realize that although my way of doing things is ONE way it is not necessarily THE way. God made each of us unique and different for a reason, and if He wanted everyone to be like me (ha!) He would've done so. Since He didn't, I need to take a step back and look at the bigger picture.<br />
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If you are a control freak like myself, you're not alone. If you're struggling with this whole pride thing in thinking that you know best about EVERYTHING, you're not alone. My encouragement to you (and myself) is to praise God that He is pointing out this character trait that needs chiseling, and ask Him to work on your heart to remove the root of pride.<br />
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Be encouraged with this verse: "Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted." Matthew 23:12.<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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You've been showing me recently that I have a problem with pride. I have a tendency to think that my way is the best way, and I become a control freak in trying to get others to see that my way is the best way. I'm so wrong. Thank You for making me aware of my tendency toward pride, and I pray that you'll forgive me and continue chiseling off the rough places on my heart. Continue molding, making, and shaping me into the image of Your Son. In Jesus' Name.<br />
<br />Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-83475860308985308742016-03-03T10:39:00.000-08:002016-03-04T12:33:39.461-08:00When the Results Aren't What You WantedPsalm 118:24 ESV, "This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it."<br />
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I ran to the store to get a pregnancy test. I knew that it was this week that we'd find out if I was pregnant or not. I knew last month it wasn't a probability. It was pushing it too much by the time we got married for us to have a honeymoon baby, but surely... we could have a Valentine's Day baby.<br />
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For some of you reading this (Mom, Mrs. Hoisington, and Grandpa) this is TMI. However, for the rest of you reading this, I hope what I share here will be an encouragement to you.<br />
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So, for the last two weeks, I have been extremely aware of any change (or possible change) my body has made. If I have felt any ache at all, I made a note of it and convinced myself that I, yes I, was pregnant. "Surely it wasn't like that before..." I'd reason in my mind. "I don't remember feeling this way..."<br />
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I was so anxious to know what the answer would be. We had timed it. We were confident about it. I was convinced that it was so. I even disregarded the negative pregnancy test justifying that I had, after all, taken the test two days before I was supposed to.<br />
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But then...<br />
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I got the lovely guest of the month that assured me that I, in fact... am not pregnant.<br />
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Nathan had already gone to work when I found out this fact. Initially, there were tears at the realization that although I was convinced of pregnancy, I was in fact wrong. In our minds, there was such a huge possibility, but the reality was a result that we really didn't want.<br />
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In all honesty, Nathan and I have only been married for a month and a half. It really isn't such a huge deal that this isn't the month. It hasn't been that long. But, what I realized that I never could empathize with before marriage is how a woman feels when she has hope of a positive pregnancy test only to find that what she was feeling may have just been PMS symptoms.<br />
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Nathan's and my desire to have a baby is something that I believe is a noble desire. However, as we wait for God's timing to have a baby, I was all too familiar with the anticipation of wanting "the next step" to happen now. The same desire I have to be a mother is equal to the desire I had before to be a wife.<br />
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But I don't want to have the same attitude in waiting to be a mother that I had in my single years while waiting for my sweet husband to be in my life.<br />
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I spent every year from the time I was twelve until my wedding day dreaming of the day I'd have my husband by my side. Throughout all those years, I lived with an attitude of discontentment and a belief that I'd be happy "when" I was married.<br />
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Truth be told, I do have a great sense of peace now that my husband is in my life. However, I realize now that I'm married that contentment doesn't come from what you have or do not have. It is rooted in a heart attitude.<br />
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During my years of singleness, I anticipated "the next step" to the point that I didn't just enjoy where God had me that day. I worried. I cried. I panicked that I'd be alone forever.<br />
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All those fears turned out to be a waste of time. Today as I write this, I am married, and I'm not just married. I'm married to a godly man who I admire and love more than life itself, and he loves me. I'm married to a man who encourages me to be more like Christ and loves me on my best days and on my ugliest ones.<br />
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For years, I believed the lies of the enemy as he tormented me with fear... fear that I'd be alone forever or fear that there were no godly guys left out there and, if I married, I'd have to settle. I didn't have to listen to those lies, but I chose to.<br />
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But never again.<br />
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Life is all about waiting. We wait in the small areas of life such as lines at the grocery store to waiting in backed up traffic. Then, we wait in the huge areas of life such as waiting for a spouse, a baby, and even to find out doctor results. We spend our whole lives waiting, however the key isn't about how to get everything we want right now. The key is found in Psalm 118:24 where it says, "This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." ESV.<br />
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There is a song that I heard growing up that sings this exact verse, and that song came to mind the other day when I found out that right now isn't God's time for Nathan and me to be parents.<br />
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I knew in that moment that I had a choice. I could either cry and be upset and ungrateful (as I did in my single years) over one thing that I'm hoping for that I don't have yet, or I could start praising God for EVERY blessing that He has given me so graciously. As I think about all that He has done in my life over this last year, how on earth could I possibly have an attitude of ungratefulness? Even if He hadn't done any of those things, though, He came and died for me. He gave me eternal life with Him!<br />
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I realized how selfish I'd been to be living with discontentment rooted in my heart, and I decided I never want to be that person again!<br />
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Do I still hope to have a baby someday? Absolutely! However, on the journey to that glorious day, I refuse to spend even one moment taking for granted where God has me today.<br />
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When Nathan got home the other night and I talked with him about how I felt about the whole thing, it was such a precious moment for me when I got to walk over to him, look in his eyes, and say, "Baby, I have everything I could possibly want right here! I don't need anything else to make me happy."<br />
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When you can get to the point that you can say, "I don't need that to be happy." you've just found freedom. Do I think Nathan and I will never have a baby? Certainly not. But if that was God's choice for us, I could honestly say that I'm happy anyway.<br />
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"This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24 ESV.<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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I'm so grateful that You're growing me even still. Lord, as I look back over all the years I lived in discontentment, I see what a waste of time that really was. I was so worried about the next step that I missed out on enjoying where you had me in that season. I don't want to make the same mistake again. I don't want to miss out on this season of it just being my husband and me at home and getting to enjoy married life. Lord, we would love to be parents in Your timing, but thank You for this extra time that we have before sleepless nights, crying babies, and dirty diapers to just enjoy one another. Help me enjoy the journey. This is the day You have made, and I will rejoice and be glad in it.<br />
<br />
I love You, Jesus!<br />
Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-22161695267946422462016-02-26T17:30:00.000-08:002016-02-27T10:52:54.080-08:00Am I Doing Enough?Matthew 6:33 ESV, "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you."<br />
<br />
Before I got married, there was a question that plagued my mind: "What am I supposed to do with my life?" I knew I desired to be a wife and mom, but with the possibility of that being far down the road, I questioned what I was supposed to be doing "now". Deep inside me, I wanted to be doing something with my life that mattered. I didn't want to be wasting my time and watching life pass me by.<br />
<br />
It always seemed as if there was something more I was supposed to be doing. I tried to find the answer to my question through working more. When I was working part-time, I felt like that wasn't responsible enough, so I sought full-time work. Then, when I began working full-time, I felt I was falling short in relational areas. It was a constant battle that I thought would be solved after marriage.<br />
<br />
However, I am now married, and I'm finding myself asking the same question that I asked all that time I was single:<br />
<br />
"What am I supposed to do with my life?"<br />
<br />
I thought this question would go away after I said, "I do!" I thought, "Once I'm married, my title will be 'wife'. Surely that will make me feel like I'm doing enough."<br />
<br />
Nope.<br />
<br />
When my husband and I got engaged, we decided very quickly that we were going to move away from our hometown so we could be closer to his job. I had just got a full-time job two months before we got engaged, but when we decided that we were going to move once we got married, I quit working so I could spend time with my family before moving. The game plan order went like this in my mind: quit my job, get married, move, honeymoon, then look for work as soon as we get back from our honeymoon.<br />
<br />
I thought that game plan sounded ideal.<br />
<br />
However, what I didn't know was that when we got back from our honeymoon, there was going to be an adjustment period of trying to figure out how this whole wife thing works. I didn't realize it was going to take so much time to figure out how to cook meals, take care of laundry, budget, grocery shop, keep the apartment up, and adjust to all the other changes that go along with this wonderful gift of marriage.<br />
<br />
What I also didn't know was that it was going to be so tiresome and frustrating to find another job.<br />
<br />
For the last two weeks, I've been looking for another job. There are many things I'm contemplating on the back of my mind, though, as I consider going back to work. I don't want my husband and I to have conflicting schedules. What is the point of being married if we will never see one another? Another thing I am contemplating is that we both desire to have a baby as soon as God allows. Is it worth me going back to work right now when that may mean months down the road I quit to take care of our baby? Lastly, the main jobs I've worked have been retail. Many jobs that are not retail require credentials that I don't have, but the thought of going back to retail makes me want to pull my hair out (a bit dramatic, I know). Plus, I am concerned I will have to work in the evenings which would mean (once more) I would not see my husband.<br />
<br />
Then come along the well-intentioned people who ask: "What are you doing in your spare time?"<br />
<br />
Oftentimes, when met with that question, I have a difficult time answering. My life consists of many things where I'm constantly taking care of things, but trying to recall every little thing I'm doing each day can be difficult to recount. I know personally I'm doing a lot, but when met with that question, I once more feel as if others think I'm not doing enough.<br />
<br />
Round and round the cycle goes.<br />
<br />
I thought I was the only one who ever felt like this, but after listening to other people, I've found that deep down many of us are asking the same question I have been: "Am I doing enough?"<br />
<br />
My sweet husband already works over 40 hours a week, and then he comes home and looks for more ways to add to our income so we can save more and prepare for the future.<br />
<br />
I have friends who also are curious to know exactly what they're supposed to do with their lives.<br />
<br />
Today as I came before God in prayer expressing all my concerns and thoughts I shared with you, what was laid on my heart were two things. First, I was reminded of the simple verse: Matthew 6:33 ESV, "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." I found great comfort as I took my eyes off of the temporary and put them back on the eternal. The second thing I was reminded of were the verses before Matthew 6:33 (verses 25-32) which talk about not being anxious for anything. It reminds us of the birds and the lilies which God takes care of and how we are much more valuable than they are. Certainly God will take care of us too.<br />
<br />
From this passage, what I realize is that I need to get rid of self-care and instead surrender to God-care. Yes, I need to do my job, but at the end of the day, I need to seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and I need to trust that the same God who takes care of the birds and the lilies is going to take care of me.<br />
<br />
I'm discovering that I need to change my question. No longer should my question be, "Am I doing enough?" Quite honestly, I can't do it all. The question is, "Am I doing what God wants me to do?"<br />
<br />
When my focus is on self-care, all I can see is exactly that... self. However, if my focus is on God-care, I am focused on Him and what He cares about.<br />
<br />
Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
<br />
Sometimes I get so wrapped up in wondering if I'm doing enough that I completely ignore if I'm doing what You want me to do. Personally, I want to do it all. I want to be super-wife, super-woman, super-worker, and super-Christian... but I'm finding that the more I try to become all these things, I'm missing the greatest priority. Lord, lift my eyes off of the temporal and fix them on the eternal. Make me into who You want me to be rather than who I think I need to be.<br />
<br />
In Jesus' Name.<br />
<br />
Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-41929352090449477802016-02-13T15:30:00.000-08:002016-02-13T15:30:18.497-08:00RememberPsalm 105:5, "Remember the wondrous works that he has done, his miracles, and the judgments he uttered..."<br />
<br />
Hi everyone!<br />
<br />
It's been a while since I've shared a new devotional on here. Life has felt like a whirlwind these last few months. Finally, things seem to be slowing down, and I should get the chance to write more.<br />
<br />
What's on my heart to share with you today is this simple word "remember".<br />
<br />
In a fast paced world where we're constantly looking ahead to the next thing, it's easy to get so wrapped up in the hustle and bustle of life that we forget to stop and remember. I can attest to the fact that I've been wrapped up in the hustle and bustle ever since the middle of last year. With job changes, an engagement, a wedding, and moving, I was a little (okay, a lot) wrapped up in my own little world. I talked about the wedding so much that my poor mom just needed a day off from talking about "the wedding" at times because that was my sole focus for weeks.<br />
<br />
Now things have slowed down, and I'm able to sit here and write... and remember.<br />
<br />
As I reflect on this last year, I can't fully grasp all that's taken place. This time last year I saw no possibility of being where I'm at today. I was at the same job I'd been at for three years. I saw no hope of ever getting married, and don't even get me started on Valentine's Day. Ha!<br />
<br />
Today, as I sit here in my apartment, married, looking forward to Valentine's Day, and beginning a whole new chapter in life, I'm wanting to recap on some things I want to remember.<br />
<br />
I want to remember where God's brought me from.<br />
<br />
For many of you reading this, you've read through my devotionals for years and have listened as I've shared my heart with you about my desire to be a wife. You've watched the different seasons in my life and have shared in my struggles through the times I couldn't see what God was doing up ahead. Now, not only have you got to watch me walk down the aisle, but you've also got to witness the faithfulness of the God we serve. You've got to see that, not only did God allow me to be a wife, He also allowed me to marry a godly man who was totally worth the wait. Nathan's and my testimony both are things I'm grateful God's allowing us to share. We both felt hopeless at times, but both of us would do it all over again knowing what we know now! We couldn't see it at the time, but God could, and I never want to forget that. In those years of me not being able to understand, God was up to something behind the scenes, and He was growing Nathan's and my faith in the process.<br />
<br />
Another thing I want to remember is the process of how we got here.<br />
<br />
From the very start, God was working. Nathan has been all over the world, and he met me in the small town I grew up in. Every time I think of this, I'm amazed. I mean, he was half way around the world at one point... and he met me in Tehachapi! This is a huge example of how God was working to bring us together. Even in small ways, though, when I think back to some of the silly things I worried about at times, I now think they're just that... silly. I remember when Nathan and I just got engaged, we were so discouraged just about not being able to find a church that would do our wedding since we were in-between churches. That proved to be just the start of our many situations we'd come up against that could steal our peace if we allowed them to. However, here we are today, married and realizing it all worked out. I wasted a lot of time worrying.<br />
<br />
What is the point of looking back and remembering?<br />
<br />
I believe there could be many reasons it's important to remember. One of which is so that we don't forget the Lord. Deuteronomy 8:11 says, "Take care lest you forget the Lord your God by not keeping his commandments and his rules and his statutes, which I command you today..." God warns us through the following verses about making sure we don't forget Him when blessings come our way. How true I'm finding that to be! In seasons of struggle, I cling to God so tight, but in seasons of prosperity, sometimes I'm tempted to think, "I've got this, God." Ha! Yeah right!<br />
<br />
It's important to remember that the same God sustaining us through difficulty is sustaining us through seasons of blessing!<br />
<br />
My favorite thing about remembering is that when I'm tempted to worry again, I'm encouraged as I remember the times I worried before and then realized what a waste of time that was.<br />
<br />
There's been a lot of changes in my life, as you could imagine, and they're really good changes. At the same time, they feel overwhelming on occasion. I've had some moments where I've just lost it in front of Nathan as I've expressed that this is my first time living away from home and as I've drug my feet in the ground on applying for a new job at the thought of one more change. If I don't look back and remember how far God's brought us, I feel overwhelmed, but if I look back, I see that the same God who calmed my fear of not knowing where we would get married is the same God Who will calm my fear if I go back to work in a new environment.<br />
<br />
Today, think about this word "remember" and watch as your heart is encouraged by recalling all God's done! Read through Psalm 105 as the Old Testament stories are retold in a chapter. You'll experience a fresh new perspective as you read of God's faithfulness. Then, when you look back over the places God's walked you through, praise Him and know that He is the same God today that He was then.<br />
<br />
Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
<br />
Today You're reminding me of the importance of remembering... remembering Who You are, where You've brought me through, and how You've got me here today. As I recall my own life, I see how You have been working all along, and it brings so much encouragement to my heart knowing that You'll continue to work in my life through this new chapter. I pray that anyone reading this will be encouraged as they read Your Word and remember all You did then and all You've done in their lives. Let that encourage them to know You'll continue to guide them where they're at.<br />
<br />
Jesus, thank You!<br />
<br />
Amen.<br />
<br />
<br />God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-50500078630995640412015-12-28T23:51:00.001-08:002015-12-28T23:57:21.750-08:00Too Blessed to Stress1 Peter 5:7, "...casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." ESV<br />
<br />
The countdown is drawing to a close as we approach our wedding that will be here in just two and a half short weeks. It's the moment we've both been waiting for, praying for, expectantly looking for, and dreaming of our whole lives... the day we would marry the love of our lives.<br />
<br />
And it's almost here!!!<br />
<br />
Emotions are beginning to rise in excitement as we draw closer and closer with every passing moment to that glorious day when we will exchange our vows and promise our love to one another for as long as we both shall live!<br />
<br />
How could I ask for more?<br />
<br />
This is it! It's my dream come true!<br />
<br />
Yet in the midst of the crazy happy emotions of us getting to start our married lives together in about eighteen days, there is another crazy emotion that is doing everything it possibly can to take over my thought process and steal the excitement right out of this incredibly blessed season... that emotion is called "stress".<br />
<br />
I was doing fairly well up until about two days ago when the reality of how soon the wedding is hit, and I started thinking about all that still needs to be done in the short two and a half weeks we have left.<br />
<br />
This may sound like a surprise, but the wedding details aren't really what I'm even worried about. It's that we are trying to get our apartment all set up THE WEEK BEFORE THE WEDDING!<br />
<br />
Are we crazy?<br />
<br />
I've heard the week before the wedding is a very busy week, and we decided when we went apartment hunting to say we didn't need to have the apartment until exactly one week before the wedding takes place. We aren't just moving down the street either. We are moving 45 minutes to an hour away from where we currently are at...<br />
<br />
There it began!<br />
<br />
"How are we going to get everything accomplished in the short amount of time we have left to work with?" "Will we sleep on the floor the first night back from our honeymoon being that we haven't even picked up a bed yet?" "We're both going out of town the day we sign for the apartment to go on our bachelor/bachelorette parties! That leaves us with 4... maybe 4.5 days to work on the apartment before the wedding! What are we going to do?"<br />
<br />
On and on the questions and panic went in my mind with thoughts of, "How are we going to do all this!?!?!"<br />
<br />
Last night I was pretty worked up about the many details on my mind, but today, the one thing God keeps laying on my heart is this: "Cast your care."<br />
<br />
In 1 Peter 5:7 we read, "...casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." ESV<br />
<br />
This is exactly what God has been speaking to my heart through.<br />
<br />
I've been so wrapped up in all the details of "how? when? and what if?" that I've been hanging on to stress, worry, and reason that really leave me in a rut because I'm not entrusting all these details into the hands of God Himself.<br />
<br />
What I'm finding in this amazingly beautiful season of walking into marriage and all the changes that it brings with it is that this is a season to rejoice... and it's also a season to learn how to trust God deeper.<br />
<br />
As I'm getting ready to move into our own place in just two and a half weeks, I'm moving out of the home I grew up in and am familiar with.<br />
<br />
As I step out of the world of living with my parents and walk into the world of having to manage our own bills... I feel unqualified.<br />
<br />
As I exit the world of wondering who God has for me and enter the world of building a Christ-centered marriage with the man He's so graciously given to me... I fear I'll fall short.<br />
<br />
And this is when God whispers to my heart, "Cast your care."<br />
<br />
This morning as I was driving, I prayed a simple prayer. I asked God to take care of the apartment situation. I prayed if there was any way possible He'd allow us to get the apartment early, and I shared that even if we didn't I was going to trust Him that it'd all work out regardless.<br />
<br />
Then, I made a call.<br />
<br />
I shared with the guy who works at the apartment that I knew it probably wasn't a possibility, but I wanted to know if we could get the apartment early if they were finished with it early. He put me on hold, and when he got back on the phone, he said we could have it as soon as the fifth.<br />
<br />
That gave us four extra days!!<br />
<br />
Currently, we're waiting to find out if that'll work with Nathan's work schedule, but once more, regardless of the outcome, I saw how God took care of us and how my stressing was truly such a waste of time.<br />
<br />
The phrase that's been on my mind all day is the Christian term, "Too blessed to be stressed!"<br />
<br />
That's so true!<br />
<br />
In the next two weeks of having a lot going on and a lot of changes taking place, I can stress, or I can count my blessings. I can focus on my fears, or I can praise God for the amazing things He's done in my life! I can allow stress to take over my thoughts, or I can take every thought captive under the obedience of Christ and find peace.<br />
<br />
Have you found yourself stressed out lately?<br />
<br />
Me too!<br />
<br />
Instead of focusing on whatever is causing you stress, my challenge for you is to put as much energy you'd put into stressing into praising God for every blessing instead! We're too blessed to stress!<br />
<br />
Dear Jesus,<br />
<br />
As the wedding draws near and the details seem to maximize, I pray You'll keep my focus on You. Lord, I've been stressed! I've allowed the questions of "how? when? and what if?" to take over my thought process and rob me of joy that You've freely given me. Forgive me for not trusting You more. Forgive me for worrying instead of casting my care. Thank You, Jesus, that You are in control! I love You and pray You'll be glorified in this season of celebration and transition. In Jesus' Name I pray.<br />
<br />
Amen.<br />
<br />
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God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-61024024069380849432015-12-11T08:26:00.001-08:002015-12-11T08:30:31.947-08:00Astonishing KindnessPsalm 105:1, "Give thanks to the Lord and proclaim his greatness. Let the whole world know what he has done."<br />
<br />
As some of you know, Nathan and I are getting married in just five weeks. The wedding planning has been going on for a few months now, and we are beginning to get busier and busier with last minute details. This week has included my bridal shower, meeting with our wedding coordinator, securing a hair and makeup beautician, getting a timeline from our photographer, and finding a DJ.<br />
<br />
This is a very exciting season in Nathan's and my life both. That in itself is something to celebrate, but the joy that I'm wanting to share with you today goes beyond Nathan and me.<br />
<br />
Something I've seen through the course of this wedding preparation is the astonishing kindness people have shown to us.<br />
<br />
My matron of honor has gone above and beyond in making our wedding special. She came up from Sacramento to visit, and while she was here she took time to make a video of Nathan answering questions about how many kids he thinks we'll have to where he sees us living in ten years to surprise me with a gift I'll treasure throughout his and my marriage! She gave me the most beautiful bridal shower imaginable and has truly blessed me through the entire wedding planning season.<br />
<br />
Another person who has blessed me is our photographer. I paid her for four hours of photography at our wedding, however that won't be enough time to get pictures of everything. Instead of cutting our time short, she said she will give us more time and told me not to worry about it because it's her gift to us. Once again, I've been left in amazement over the kindness we've been receiving.<br />
<br />
Then, last night we went to meet with someone who is going to be our DJ/MC at the reception. From what I understand, DJs are normally very expensive. We met with this person keeping that in mind, but when we sat down to discuss the wedding, he shared with us, "This is something I do for fun, so I'm not going to charge you to do your wedding."<br />
<br />
By this point, I had seen God's hand of provision and blessing so much in the course of one week that I was about to burst with praise, and I had to share with you today the amazing things God has done! I can't keep quiet about these blessings! I can't remain silent and not share with you the incredible goodness of God!<br />
<br />
It's easy to look at our world and see all the doom and gloom on the news, in our Facebook newsfeed, and in life in general, but I'm here to share with you that there is still much to be to thankful for and people still show astonishing kindness today!<br />
<br />
As I'm beginning to praise God more and more, I'm realizing that there are a lot of other things I could be sharing with you in this devotional about the goodness of God and the astonishing kindness of others. Perhaps we just overlook all the blessings instead of taking time to praise God for them.<br />
<br />
So, my question is this... How has God blessed you today, this week, or this month?<br />
<br />
We need to heed the instruction of Psalm 105:1 and, "Give thanks to the Lord and proclaim his greatness. Let the whole world know what he has done." I'd love to hear your stories!<br />
<br />
Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
<br />
I hear often about all the doom and gloom, but I'm seeing that there is a lot to be thankful for and I've been amazed at the astonishing kindness people have shown me in the recent months! Thank You for the blessings You've given me, and thank You for opening my eyes to see that goodness. I pray You'll help me not overlook these gifts but rather take time to praise You for them. In Jesus' Name.<br />
<br />
Amen.<br />
<br />God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-68219460612699078772015-11-21T00:45:00.001-08:002015-11-23T08:54:58.903-08:00Don't Miss the Better ThingPsalm 39:6-7, "We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing
ends in nothing. We heap up wealth, not knowing who will spend it. And so,
Lord, where do I put my hope? My only hope is in you."<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
"How are you?"<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
"Busy!"<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Has this ever been your answer to the question, "How are you?"
This has been my answer in the recent months. Between work and planning a
wedding, I've certainly felt like "busy" is the word that describes
me the most these days.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
It's good not be lazy, but today I'd like to run a thought by you: Is being
busy any better than being lazy?<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
They're both extreme.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
On one side of this equation, you're wasting the life God's given you to
live by not doing anything with it. However, on the other side of this
equation, you're running here, there, and everywhere and convincing yourself
you're living while you're really just watching life pass you by.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
So, what are we to do?<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Today, I'm going to share where I've been finding myself in this
"busy" season of my life.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
I recently started a new job where I've been working 8:30-5:30 Monday
through Friday. If I have to work on Saturdays, I have Monday off, and on
Sundays, we're closed. You seriously cannot beat those hours!<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
About two months after I got this job, I got engaged to the most incredible
man I've ever known!<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Just between these two life events, you can see how "busy" could
be a word that fits the description of my life in this season.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
My schedule lately has looked like this:<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
6:30 wake up<br />
Time with God<br />
7:30 Get cleaned up and ready for work<br />
8:30 Go to work<br />
12:30 Lunch<br />
1:30 Back to work<br />
5:30 Off<br />
Evening: Time with Nathan, time with our families, date nights, and wedding
planning<br />
Bedtime: Who sleeps?<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
For the last three years I've been trying to fit a mold that I thought I
needed to fit into. In my mind, I felt I wasn't doing enough since I didn't
have a man and I wasn't working full time. I remember in that season feeling as
if something were missing, and I wasn't measuring up to this idea I had in my
mind about where I should be. So, I prayed for God to change all that. I looked
for full time work but found none, and I remained in a part time position for
years, all the while thinking I should be doing something more.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Then, last December, I was offered full time hours for that month at Big 5.
I got a taste of what it'd be like to get what I thought I wanted all that
time.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
However, what I found last year in that season wasn't a full life. I was
busy, but I missed so many things that I looked back on with regret. I had to
work Christmas Eve, and my family actually celebrates Christmas on Christmas
Eve, so by the time I was off work, Christmas was over. I wrote a devotional
about it actually (<a href="http://taylorjasmine.blogspot.com/2014/12/when-god-gives-you-what-you-think-you.html"><span style="color: blue;">When
God Gives You What You Think You Want</span></a>) and shared that the life I thought
that I wanted took away from the life that I love.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
You'd think I'd have learned my lesson, but it's nearly December again, and
as you can see my life has been quite "busy" lately.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
God's been doing incredible things in my life, and I don't want to downplay
that. He's blessed me with an absolutely amazing, godly man who I'm proud to
say will be my husband in less than two months. He's provided a full time job
for me with hours that you just can't beat. I've seen His hand move in my life
this year in ways I never knew possible. And yet, in this season where you'd
look at me and think, "She has it all." what I'm finding is that I'm
missing it all by me being so wrapped up in the middle of it.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
I got everything I thought I wanted, but I gave up some things that are
truly important and precious in the process. Sadly, I'm the one who chose to
give up those things. Nobody asked me to.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
I gave up a ministry that I've been passionate about since I was twelve. I
gave up friends, good friends, that before I started labeling myself as
"busy" I would've given anything to have. I gave up family that has
invested in me all my life and knows and loves me warts and all. And I've had
to watch myself and be careful with the wedding planning because if I'm not, I
give up precious moments with my dear fiancé fretting over wedding details or
marriage details that seem to be so urgent when in all actuality don't matter
much at the end of the day.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
And today, just days before Thanksgiving and a little over a month
before Christmas, I'm alarmed by the fact that if I continue on the path I've
been on, I'll be reliving the same devotional I shared last year.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
The mold of the person I always thought I needed to be turns out being
the exact person I never wanted to be.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
I never wanted to be the person who was "too busy" for family,
"too busy" to help, "too busy" to serve, too
"busy" to love... and yet that's exactly who I've chosen to be.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
As God's been opening my eyes to the truth of this, I've began seeking His
will as to what it is He wants me to do and what changes He'd like me to make.
This morning, I read some devotionals and read about two very different women
in the Bible. I read about Martha, and I read about the Proverbs 31 woman. <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Both of these women were "busy", but one was busy in a good way
and one was missing life due to her busyness.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
What I noticed about the Proverbs 31 woman was her outreach and the impact
she had on the people around her. She helped the poor, took care of her family,
spoke wisely, and is someone people looked up to. Yes, she was busy, but it was
more than being busy. It was being fruitful. Her life bore good, lasting fruit.
She's a woman I'd like to model.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Then, we take a look at another busy lady. She was trying to keep up with
the house chores which I find to be an admirable thing, but the problem was
that when Jesus came around, Martha was so wrapped up in her busyness that
she missed what was better... sitting at Jesus' feet. When Martha went to
Jesus all upset that Mary wasn't helping around the house, Jesus said to
her in Luke 10:42, "Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not
be taken away from her." NIV <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
So, my question can be summed up with this one short sentence: Am I allowing
my busyness to cause me to miss what is better?<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Today if I take a good, honest look at my life, who do I most model? The
Proverbs 31 woman or Martha? <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
For many weeks, my life has resembled Martha. I've been doing a lot of busy
rushing that ends in nothing. I've allowed my busyness to cause me to miss what
is better. I've been wrapped up and out of balance.<br />
<br />
So, after having my crazy schedule laid upon my heart as being out of
balance and me considering what is better and praying about the situation, I
chose to make some changes to my schedule.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
I quit my job.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
"Hold on, Taylor! Are you saying we need to all quit our jobs in order
to pursue what is better?"<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
No!!! Again... NO!!!<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
In this season of my life with getting married in just eight weeks and
getting ready to move an hour away where I was quitting my job soon anyway, I
chose to quit my job earlier than I was planning to in order to spend some time
with my family for the holidays and before getting married and moving. So, for
this season, that decision panned out. However, that wouldn't be a wise
decision in many cases, so quitting jobs is not what I'm promoting here. What I
am saying is that in a world that prides itself on rising up the corporate
ladder and making a name for ourselves, perhaps we are getting out of balance
and missing what's most important. Last year, I worked a lot more hours during
Christmas time. I gave much more extravagant gifts than I had the years before.
But, my family didn't have me last Christmas. They had stuff I gave to them,
but they didn't have me.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
I don't want to relive that.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
I'm not going to relive that.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Our culture is busy all year long, but especially around November/December
time. But at the end of it, is the busyness of your life producing good,
lasting fruit, or is it causing you to miss the better thing?<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
In my case, I was missing the better thing. Whether you're struggling with
the whole balance of this or you're doing fairly well with it, I encourage you
with this: Don't be too busy for God's plan. Don't miss sitting at Jesus' feet,
and don't miss the better thing.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Dear Heavenly Father,<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
It's a tough balance sometimes to know when we're being lazy and when we're
being un-fruitfully busy. Please help me find the balance between the two and
be a hard worker while still not missing the better thing. I pray that this
holiday season will not be missed in all our rushing but that it will be a
season that brings honor to You.<br />
<br />
In Jesus' Name.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-44171462315483533322015-11-20T23:21:00.001-08:002015-11-20T23:27:21.634-08:00The Way He Looks at Me<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
Psalm 40:1-3, "I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord."<br />
<br />
Have you ever prayed for something (or someone) for years and felt like you'd prayed the same thing so long that God probably was as tired of hearing it as you were of praying it?<br />
<br />
That was me.<br />
<br />
If you've followed many of my blog posts or read my book, you probably caught on to the fact that it's been a desire of my heart for a LONG time to have a godly man by my side to one day marry and raise a family with. Most of my devotionals have something shared in them that mentions that desire often.<br />
<br />
Today, I'm writing a devotional that still includes that same desire, but this time, I have been given a new song to sing... a hymn of praise to my God.<br />
<br />
I was the girl whose whole dream since the time she was 12 was to be a wife and mom. I was the girl who didn't just look for a boyfriend... I was keeping an eye out for my lifetime friend, the man I'd marry, and the man who would be the father of my children.<br />
<br />
At first, this seemed like such a simple request, but after years of watching, praying, and hoping, I began to turn into the girl who was cynical and thought maybe my dream was just a little too far out of reach or perhaps just unrealistic altogether.<br />
<br />
Was my prayer for a godly man too big of a dream?<br />
<br />
I started believing that it was. After one crushed hope after another, it felt like it'd be best to give up altogether on the hope of having someone to share my life with.<br />
<br />
Yet, God didn't give up on me even through my unbelief.<br />
<br />
This year, God brought a godly man into my life... a man that truly is doing his best to seek and honor Christ with his whole heart, and I can honestly tell you that God not only answered my prayer for a godly man. He gave me more than I could've ever dreamed possible when He gave me Nathan.<br />
<br />
It can all be seen in the way he looks at me.<br />
<br />
In a world where promiscuity is idolized and purity is degraded, God saved a man for me who tells me weekly (if not daily), "I have eyes for only you, baby!" In a culture where waiting for marriage is considered overrated, God gave me a man who not only values my purity but has conviction about purity himself and refuses to look at me with lust but chooses daily to honor me with love.<br />
<br />
The girl who at one point felt like it was a lost cause to keep hoping for a godly man now has a godly man by her side, and it's on my heart to not keep quiet in this season where my world feels like it's all falling into place. That'd be horrible for me to write all these years about me longing for a spouse who loves God and then not shout on the rooftops the miracle God has done in my life and the huge answer to prayer He has given me!<br />
<br />
Girls, I'm begging you! Don't settle for less than God's best for you. Don't settle for a man who looks at you with lust rather than with love. Don't buy into the lie that your desire for a godly man is too big of a request for God to honor.<br />
<br />
Wait patiently for the Lord and trust that He will turn to you and hear your cry.<br />
<br />
Right now, I'm sharing with you the promise land of my story, but trust me when I tell you that it wasn't a breeze to get here. I've been through the lonely nights. I've been through the heartache of finding out someone was a wolf when you momentarily believed they were your prince charming. I've been through thinking that a godly man wouldn't want me because I'm not perfect.<br />
<br />
However, at the end of the day, it's not about what we do or do not deserve. It's about the God we serve. He is bigger than us, and if we will wait on Him, He honestly will prove to be faithful every time!<br />
<br />
I have a passion to share with girls that they have a God who loves them passionately and perfectly and a God Who has a good plan for their lives. Wait for the man that you can look at and sincerely tell him, "Through the way you love me, I have a better understanding of how Christ loves the church."<br />
<br />
Ephesians 5:25-28 says, "For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God's word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself."<br />
<br />
When you have a man who loves you as Christ loves the church, it makes our command in verses 22-24 a privilege instead of a burden:<br />
<br />
"For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the Church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything."<br />
<br />
What God designed is beautiful! His dream is beautiful!<br />
<br />
If you're tired of waiting, you're not alone. But my prayer is that you'll draw closer to God in this season of waiting and continue to wait. "Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning." Psalm 30:5.<br />
<br />
Dear Jesus,<br />
<br />
As I think back on my own story and all the places You've walked me through, it's on my heart to share with other girls and women, one, that they're not alone and, two, that Your plan is always worth waiting for. I praise You for the season You've brought me to, Lord, and I also praise You for the seasons You walked me through in the previous years of waiting and praying for this day. I pray that many will see what You have done and be amazed and put their trust in You. Let your faithfulness not be something I shrug off, but rather let it be something that is a testimony to others of Who You are. In Jesus' Name.<br />
<br />
Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-33651873872431184342015-10-17T08:29:00.000-07:002015-10-17T09:16:26.942-07:00This Evil Monster Called "Selfishness"Proverbs 14:1 NLT, "A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands."<br />
<br />
Philippians 2:4 NLT, "Don't look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others too."<br />
<br />
Have you ever had a day where you managed to hurt an entire handful of people you love all in just a matter of hours? Yesterday, I was excelling at that. I was hurtful to a majority of the people that are closest to me.<br />
<br />
Let me share with you the reality of my horrible attitude yesterday that lead from a bad attitude to the start of an all out mess.<br />
<br />
It all started with this evil monster called selfishness.<br />
<br />
I live in California very close to where all the flooding on the highways is taking place. Where I live is smack dab in the center of highway mess in both directions where if you want to get in or out of town you'd better be prepared for a headache.<br />
<br />
All day yesterday, I listened to the reports from people saying what they heard about the status of the highway on when it would be reopened. Some said over the weekend. Some said in five days. Some even said it was closed indefinitely.<br />
<br />
Why would these conversations affect me?<br />
<br />
For one, my dad works on one side of the freeway, and what normally is an hour commute would've turned into a nine hour drive for him to get back home. For another reason, my fiance' works on the opposite side of the freeway where if he wanted to get back home it would've been a major headache with checkpoints and probably an hour or two of sitting in his car just to make it to the checkpoint.<br />
<br />
Thankfully, my dad made it home by the grace of God much faster than he should've been able to yesterday. Unfortunately, that wasn't true for my fiance'. There were mixed statements from people about the condition of the road and whether Nathan could get back through, and, even if he could, just how long that would take him to do. He text me yesterday evening with the bad news that he probably wasn't making it home last night.<br />
<br />
Here is where my selfish monster began to poke its head out.<br />
<br />
I thought about the reports of people who had made it back into town. I focused on the fact that he could probably make it through (totally discounting the fact that it would require him being stuck in his car for hours). All I focused on last night was myself and the fact that now I wasn't going to get to see my man.<br />
<br />
So, I started being shorter in my texts to him. Instead of having a good attitude about anything last night, I chose to have a sour one. I got to go to the movies and have a wonderful evening with my family, and even in that I kept a bad attitude focusing solely on the one night I wasn't going to get to see my fiance' instead of praising God for the incredible family I have that I got to spend time with last night.<br />
<br />
Sadly, my selfishness didn't end there.<br />
<br />
I was determined that one way or another I was going to see Nathan today.<br />
<br />
Today, I have plans to visit with a good friend of mine. We set up this time to get together about a week and a half ago. I haven't seen her in probably a month and a half to two months. But there I was, totally consumed with wanting to make it to my man, that I text her and explained the situation and considered rescheduling our time to visit.<br />
<br />
Moments after sending this text, the giant monster I had created last night was about to meet its maker.<br />
<br />
God convicted my heart big time. The mess that I had created in just one evening was now being brought to a head, and I recognized the monster of selfishness I'd allowed to envelope every area of relationships last night.<br />
<br />
God brought to my attention just how self-centered I'd been and brought me to a place of repentance.<br />
<br />
It started with me texting my good friend back and sharing with her the sad truth that I had been a mess all night and that I was wrong. I explained that yes, I love Nathan and don't want to be stuck an hour away from him, but hers and my friendship is very important to me too, and I want to see her today. I shared that God will take care of Nathan and me, and I'm not going to reschedule on her.<br />
<br />
What amazed me through this whole process was the unconditional love each and every one of the people I was hurting gave to me. My family didn't lay into me about my bad attitude. My fiance' even went as far as to send the sweetest text message to me today saying how much I mean to him... even after me being so hurtful last night. And my sweet friend was so gracious to me and was very understanding instead of telling me that I was being a horrible friend.<br />
<br />
Why am I sharing all of this with you? Because last night I saw the huge amount of damage that selfishness can bring if it is left to run your life.<br />
<br />
Selfishness destroys relationships.<br />
<br />
When I think back to last night, I'm convicted by Proverbs 14:1. I was the foolish woman tearing down my home with my own hands. I was not following the instruction of Philippians 2:4 and taking an interest in others. My entire world revolved around me last night, but thankfully, by the grace of God, I wasn't left there.<br />
<br />
God woke me up and allowed me to realize the destructive damage my selfishness was causing, and He brought me to my knees.<br />
<br />
Has the evil monster called "Selfishness" been allowed to wreck havoc in your life? I encourage you to run to God and ask Him to help you slay that monster. I guarantee you that He will.<br />
<br />
Dear Jesus,<br />
<br />
I'm so grateful that you woke me up last night and brought to my attention just how selfish I was being. Thank You for not allowing me to go on with that horrible attitude, hurting everyone I love. I praise You that You've forgiven me and washed me white as snow. Help me build up my home. Help me not look out only for my own interests, but take an interest in others too. In Jesus' Name.<br />
<br />
Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-78026718099133398992015-09-11T19:54:00.001-07:002015-09-11T20:06:16.323-07:00When God Seems StillIsaiah 43:19, "Behold, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs forth; do you not perceive and know it and will you not give heed to it? I will even make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert."<br />
<br />
Has God ever seemed still in your life?<br />
<br />
Have you ever been discouraged because you were praying for the same thing for years yet nothing seemed to be happening?<br />
<br />
I've been there before.<br />
<br />
I was the girl who prayed, waited, pleaded, and prayed some more for a someday that I began to think would never come. I remember getting on my knees by my bed at night crying out to God and feeling so lonely, so empty, and so discouraged.<br />
<br />
I tried to mask my discouraged state with a smile or a comment of, "I trust God." yet inwardly I struggled in those moments where God seemed still.<br />
<br />
Was I not praying the right prayer? Was I lacking something I needed in my character for God to answer my plea? Why did God seem still?<br />
<br />
These are the questions I wrestled with through the years of me praying for a godly man to share my life with while I continued to remain single with little sign of that changing. Surely if I were just content enough, pretty enough, or at the right place at the right time I wouldn't still be praying the same prayer I prayed since I was twelve.<br />
<br />
I don't know why God chooses to do things the way He does at times, but as I look back, I can see clearly that in those moments where God seemed still, He was up to a whole lot more than I recognized at the time.<br />
<br />
At the beginning of this year, I felt like I was stuck. It seemed as if nothing was happening in my life, and I felt like I was a nearly 21 year old girl/lady/woman/whatever with nothing changing. "Will this be my life forever?" I thought.<br />
<br />
I remember reading Isaiah 43:19 and feeling renewed hope through the simple words, "I am doing a new thing!" I was so ready for new... ready for hope. At that time when I read that verse, I didn't know just how much God meant that He was doing a new thing!<br />
<br />
In January, I saw no hope of ever seeing an answer to all those prayers I prayed when God seemed still. Now it's September, though, and that girl/lady/woman/whatever I was telling you about now has more hope than ever and can see a bright future with endless possibilities.<br />
<br />
God's been up to a lot, and let me just tell you that when God seems still, He's moving behind the scenes in ways you couldn't even imagine!<br />
<br />
He heard my prayers all those years where I felt like He gave me a whole lot of "no's" with very few "yes's". Turns out, the answer didn't stop at "no". It was, "Just wait for what I have planned up ahead!"<br />
<br />
In less than a year, I went from being someone who had a desire for a future husband that seemed so far out of reach to being a woman with a godly man by my side who I will call my husband in the upcoming months.<br />
<br />
When God seems still, the enemy loves to whisper lies and doubts into our ears and tell us that God's forgotten about us or that where we're at is never going to change. My encouragement today is to share with you that when God seems still, seek Him all the more and hold onto Isaiah 43:19 that He really is doing something new even if you can't perceive it now.<br />
<br />
Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
<br />
I'm amazed by the fact that You work behind the scenes in my life and have been writing a beautiful story that I just wasn't aware of at the time. There were moments in my life where you seemed still and I felt like I was stuck where I was at forever. However, this year You've shown me that You've been working behind the scenes all along. Your "no's" were never meant to discourage me. They were to show me that You had something up ahead worth waiting for, and sure enough, You did! I praise You for that. I pray for anyone who feels stuck tonight that You'll meet them where they're at and encourage them with my story that You really are doing something new... even if they can't perceive it. Bless them tonight, Jesus! Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-56449446678899040632015-08-14T21:43:00.004-07:002015-08-14T21:55:38.150-07:00New SeasonEcclesiastes 3:1 NLT, "For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven."<br />
<br />
This post is a little different than my normal devotional posts. Life has been changing so much in the last few months for me, and I wanted to share a little bit of what God has been up to.<br />
<br />
As I think back even to just March of this year, I'm reminded of how I felt like I was stuck and going nowhere in life. I felt like I was going to be in the same job forever and like I was never going to meet a godly man to share my life with. Things felt pretty stagnant and hopeless to say the least.<br />
<br />
Well, a lot has changed since that time! "A lot" is not even an understatement.<br />
<br />
I've shared with you a little bit about my answer to prayer: Nathan. He continues to be my miracle from God.<br />
<br />
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We have been enjoying this new journey God has us on!<br />
<br />
We've got to go to weddings together.<br />
<br />
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We're becoming more and more a part of each others' families.<br />
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<br />
And Christ has been and continues to be the center of our relationship.<br />
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Nathan has started helping teach at one of the college groups we go to.<br />
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And the pregnancy center continues to be dear to my heart!<br />
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I'm not sure that I've shared this with you or not, but I've recently started a new job as well. The owners are Christians and God is showing me favor there. Turns out I'm working 35-40 hours a week.<br />
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Needless to say, I no longer feel stuck. Quite the contrary. I feel
hope! My world is expanding, and I'm excited for this new season!<br />
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I love how easy it is to put all the pictures on this blog and make it look like I have my life all together. But that would not be an accurate description. Yes, all the changes have been a blessing, but there is a deeper story to be shared than just the fun pictures of weddings and church groups and beautiful necklaces that represent a godly relationship with Christ at the center.<br />
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This new season in addition to being a blessing has also been an adjustment period. Going from being single to being a couple and from working part time to working full time have been adjustments. Nathan and I, although totally in love, have also experienced what it's like to have to work through things together. We're trying to figure this thing called "us" out, and it's all new. We're both trying to find the healthy balance with our relationship with God, our relationship with each other, and our relationship with our families and friends and how all of these important relationships thrive in the midst of life's demands such as work and having only 24 hours in a day when we need double that amount of time and an extra pair of hands would help too.<br />
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He's had a possible career route on the back of his mind. I've had the fear of the unknown on the back of mine.<br />
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God's been teaching us to love deeper and more like Him... unchanging and unshakeable.<br />
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These are the nuggets God's been laying on my heart through the course of this new season.<br />
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First and foremost is Matthew 7:24-25 which is the theme verse of Nathan's and my relationship:<br />
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"Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won't collapse because it is built on bedrock."<br />
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Secondly, God has been laying on my heart the importance of balance:<br />
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<span class="text 1Pet-5-8" id="en-AMP-30472"><sup>"</sup>Be well balanced (temperate, sober of mind), be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion roaring [in fierce hunger], seeking someone to seize upon and devour." 1 Peter 5:8 AMP.</span><br />
<span class="text 1Pet-5-8" id="en-AMP-30472"><br /></span>
<span class="text 1Pet-5-8" id="en-AMP-30472">And in the last week or so, God has been laying on my heart the importance of not just spending time with people but investing time in those relationships.</span><br />
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<span class="text 1Pet-5-8" id="en-AMP-30472">So, there is a very brief summary of the "God's Girl Devotionals" author's life. I'm hoping to write more devotionals soon! I'll have a lot of new writing material to be sure!</span>God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-34892308584553389962015-07-16T00:05:00.001-07:002015-07-16T06:48:21.043-07:00The Power of A WomanProverbs 14:1 AMP, "Every wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands."<br />
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Ladies, have you ever noticed just how much power God's actually entrusted to us?<br />
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That may sound like an odd question, but there is something I've noticed as I've observed the women I encounter every day. Moms have a great affect on their children, and wives have a great affect on their husbands. Women don't even have to say anything verbally to speak volumes. All my mom has to do is give me "the look" and I know exactly what that means. She doesn't have to say a word. I know!<br />
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Being able to make such an affect is something I believe can be used to do great things for the Kingdom of God. Just like I know my mom's look that implies I need to stop whatever I'm doing that is wrong, I also am greatly affected just by the encouragement I receive from my mom. She is one of the people who knows me best, and to hear her compliment me can push me to spread my wings and fly because she knows my successes, but she also knows my failures and still believes in me.<br />
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That's a lot of power.<br />
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It's a blessing to have such an impact, but I'm also realizing just how big of a responsibility it is to be a woman who can change the course of her whole household with the choices I make. When I think that I can have such an affect to build up my house or to tear it down with my own hands, I'm a little overwhelmed. I'd like to say that I make wise choices always and live out being the Proverbs 31 woman every day I live, but that's just not so. I'm still hoping to be more like that woman someday, but let me just share a bit of my not so lovely choices with you today. <br />
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I'd found myself in an emotionally upset state. All I could see was sad and gloomy. It was quite depressing to say the least. I spent about two weeks wallowing in self-pity thinking I was so justified in how I felt. Surely, I wasn't the one in the wrong. I'd thought about what I was upset about over and over again for what felt like forever, and I had a pretty decent case in my mind about just how justified I really was. It felt logical... to me. In my mind, I had every right to be upset.<br />
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However, when I opened my Bible up a few days ago, I ran across Proverbs 14:1, and boy did I ever get convicted by God that I had a bad attitude and I was in fact the one with the problem.<br />
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I read, "Every wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands."<br />
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In that moment, I realized that I had stopped building my house, and I had begun being the foolish woman who was tearing it down with my own hands.<br />
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May I say, "Ouch!"<br />
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How could I go from building up my house to tearing it down in such a short time?<br />
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As I thought about what caused me to reach such a pitiful state that I was throwing my own pity party, what came to mind was that I stopped being grateful for all of my blessings, and then I was being discontent. No matter how many things I had to be grateful for, I focused solely on what I wasn't getting that I wanted and even convinced myself I needed.<br />
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I thought I had conquered the giant monster called discontentment, but sometimes it still rears its ugly head up, and I realize that I still have yet to be fully content. Philippians 4:12-13 AMP says, "I know how to be abased and live humbly in straitened circumstances, and I know also how to enjoy plenty and live in abundance. I have learned in any and all circumstances the secret of facing every situation whether well-fed or going hungry, having a sufficiency and enough to spare or going without and being in want. I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength into me; I am self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency]."<br />
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That's the woman I want to be. I desire to be able to say with Paul that I've learned how to be content in every circumstance. I love that the secret lies in being able to do all things through Christ Who strengthens us. I can't be content in my own will power. I need Christ to come and work in my heart. Thankfully I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me.<br />
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Proverbs 14:1 doesn't cause me to want to go on a power trip and try to get everyone to follow my lead. It actually does the opposite. It humbles me. I know the hurt I caused in the two weeks that I had an ungrateful and discontent attitude. I watched how my actions tore down rather than built up. With me recognizing that, I see that the more power God entrusts to me, the more I desire to lean on Him. Something God once laid on Joyce Meyers heart was a powerful statement that went something like this: "As many people as you can help is exactly how many people you can hurt." That's terrifying to me! It causes me to realize my deep need for God and the importance of Him living through my life.<br />
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So, how are you affecting the building of your house?<br />
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Are you building it up, or are you tearing it down with your own hands?<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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As I read Proverbs 14:1, I was convicted about the attitude I'd had lately. You really challenged me with that verse to make me see how I was tearing down my house rather than building it up. I pray You'll forgive me and help me build up my house from this day on. Let me see things through Your eyes and use the power You've given me to lift others up rather than tearing them down. Help me be content no matter my circumstances. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-78024096275289562312015-07-01T07:53:00.000-07:002015-07-01T07:53:11.573-07:00Where My Heart Finds RestPsalm 46:1-3 AMP, "God is our Refuge and Strength [mighty and impenetrable to temptation], a very present and well-proved help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains be shaken into the midst of the seas, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling and tumult. Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!"<br />
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We live in a world that is always changing. Sometimes the changes we experience are good changes that we've been longing for. At other times, however, the changes we face are unexpected, unwanted, and uncomfortable.<br />
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I'm a girl who likes stability. I like to know what to expect up ahead because it makes me feel like I have some kind of control (ha!). The planner part of me wants to have something to look forward to that I can count on.<br />
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Something I've found on my journey with God, though, is that rarely does He show me what lies up ahead. Rather, He asks me every day to walk by faith and trust Him with the outcome of my life.<br />
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I've been reading in Deuteronomy lately, and verse after verse I find God saying this one simple thing: "Let not your [minds and] hearts faint; fear not, and do not tremble or be terrified [and in dread] because of them. For the Lord your God is He Who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to save you." Deuteronomy 20:3b-4 AMP.<br />
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I've never read in the Bible to not be afraid because everything was going to go well for me and I wasn't going to have a care in the world. It doesn't say that. All throughout the Bible, the one constant I can find is that God will always be with me. He will never fail or abandon me. He will never change.<br />
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In my personal life, I've had a lot of good changes taking place recently. God's put a really solid, godly man in my life whom I love with all my heart. I've been hoping to begin a new season and get a new job for a while now, and God opened the door for me to get a job at a place where the hours work out better for me and whose owners are Christians from what I understand. Both of these changes are ones I'm grateful for and looking forward to seeing all God has in store for them.<br />
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Some changes that are more difficult for me to accept are the changes I see happening in the world around me. The Facebook News Feed is blowing up with "wonderful" reminders of what's happening in our world today. If I look for my stability in an ever changing world, my heart will never find the rest it so desperately longs for.<br />
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Philippians 4:6-7 has the answer to how to have the peace we are searching for. It says, "Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition (definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God. And God's peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." AMP.<br />
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When I don't just read those two verses, but I actually apply them to my life, I find peace. Peace doesn't come from easy or reliable circumstances. It doesn't come from knowing what the future holds. It comes when you finally get on your knees before the One Who holds your future in His hands.<br />
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Life isn't certain. Circumstances can change in the blink of an eye. But one thing I hold on to is this: "God is our Refuge and Strength [mighty and impenetrable to temptation], a very present and well-proved help in trouble." Psalm 46:1 AMP.<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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In a world that is ever changing, my heart finds rest in You. I sometimes think I'd like to know what lies up ahead, but instead You desire me to walk by faith and trust You with every step I take. Thank You for the peace You bring to my heart even in the midst of uncertain circumstances. Let that peace be evident to the world around me, and when they ask what's different, let them see You. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-13414189498864838042015-05-09T10:45:00.003-07:002015-05-09T10:52:42.376-07:00Something NewIsaiah 43:19, "For I am about to do something new. See, I have already
begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I
will create rivers in the dry wasteland."<br />
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Jeremiah 29:11, "'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.'"<br />
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On my way home from the store a couple weeks ago, I looked to the left of the street and saw what would've been my life walk past me. There on the left hand side of the street, I saw a new, semi-young family taking a walk. The husband, the wife, and the new baby wrapped in a blanket. Cute picture, right? Yeah, except the husband was my ex-boyfriend.<br />
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As I finished driving home with the picture of this new family freshly on my mind, I went into my room to spend some time with God. I didn't wish that I was still with my ex (that's for sure), however, sometimes I've envied the young family picture when that's my dream, and I'm not there yet. For a moment, I felt a sting, but after my time with God, I felt renewed.<br />
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That relationship with my ex ended close to two years ago. God's brought so much healing to my heart! My hope in sharing this devotional isn't to focus on the past. It's to celebrate what God is doing now... something new.<br />
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So, I've been praying for a godly man to marry for... well, since I was twelve. Okay, but I've really been passionately praying about my desire for a godly spouse and for God's direction in this process for about a year or so. There have been different guys I've met, and if any interest arose, I'd put their name in my prayer journal and ask God what He thought about me being interested in them. God really proved to me that this works when I was praying about this one guy who seemed so charming and ideal, but I found out he was really bad news, and I didn't even have to get my heart broken to find out. That's all it took. I was hooked on praying about these guys before investing my heart from here on out.<br />
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Some time passed, and my prayers continued, but apparently I didn't have God's go-ahead because I also remained single.<br />
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But then... someone came along who I realized just might be different than all the rest. I must share with you the amazing thing God's been allowing to take place in my life.<br />
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His name is Nathan.<br />
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In just the short amount of time I've known Nathan, God's given me a glimpse of what having a godly man... a truly godly man by my side could be like.<br />
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Nathan is a real Christian. "What do you mean?" you ask. His walk matches his talk. He is easy to talk to and be around. I can just be me which says a lot because I don't always have an easy time with that around guys. He seeks God about where we're heading and asks me if there's anything he can be praying for me about. He has respect for me and cherishes my heart. He is a total gentleman.<br />
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Why am I sharing all this with you?<br />
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Because in the last few weeks, I've had hope of having a godly relationship in my own life, and as I saw my ex-boyfriend with his new family taking a walk, instead of only seeing what <b>was</b> that <b>isn't, </b>I now get to see the new thing God is doing that <b>FAR EXCEEDS</b> the was!!<br />
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For so long, all I could see was my Egypt. I saw what I left, but I couldn't see hope of reaching where I was going... my promise land.<br />
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After much prayer, Nathan and I made our relationship official last night. I'm so happy to call him my boyfriend and beyond blessed to be called his girlfriend. He and I will be continuing to pray about where our relationship leads. Our greatest desire is that God is at the center of our relationship.<br />
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I don't know what God has up ahead for Nathan and I. What I do know is that I've got to see recently that God really does have a plan to prosper me, not to harm me. After the few weeks I've spent getting to know Nathan, I have restored hope in seeing that the new thing God is doing is way better than the old. I could only see what I'd given up before, but now I get to see what could be up ahead.<br />
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If you're struggling with the "what was, but isn't" as you wait to see the "what will be", I just want to encourage you with my story. God really does know the plans He has for you, and let me assure you that they are good. Don't lose hope. Leave Egypt and press on into your promise land. It does exist!<br />
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Dear Jesus,<br />
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For the first time in a long time, I have hope of reaching my promise land. Thank You for letting me see past Egypt. Thank You for putting Nathan in my life and allowing me to see what life with a godly man can be like. I pray You'll be the foundation, the center, and the focus of our relationship. I pray for anyone who feels discouraged. Help them not stay discouraged and give up along the way. Rather, let them have continued hope in You. Thank You that Your plan is so much better than what we could think up on our own. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-91413760005443977372015-05-07T09:16:00.001-07:002015-05-07T09:27:51.476-07:00Let Me Introduce You to a Man Who Is All You've Ever Hoped ForPsalm 42:1 NLT, "As the deer longs for streams of water, so I long for you, O God."<br />
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Ladies, have you ever imagined in your head your dream man? For some, he has blonde hair, blue eyes, and a smile that blows you away. For others, he's macho man with a bunch of tattoos... a biker that loves Jesus. For others still, he's a cowboy.<br />
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I believe as little girls, we all imagine in our minds what our man should look like, act like, and be like. These poor guys have already had a script in our minds that they are supposed to follow before we've even met them.<br />
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Recently, I met a young man who is truly better to me than any guy has ever been to me before. He has a heart for Jesus, and he has a heart for me. The more I get to know him, the more I care about him.<br />
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Although it may sound like this devotional is going to be me sharing all about that... it actually isn't. The reason this devotional began stirring in my heart is because of a conversation I had with a lady yesterday.<br />
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I was talking with someone I've known for some time now, and I began sharing with her about how wonderful and kind this young man is that I've been getting to know. She kindly told me how happy she is for me, but then the pain in her heart was revealed through her next statement. "I wish I could find a nice man, but I haven't found one yet."<br />
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I gently asked, "Aren't you still dating that one guy?"<br />
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"Yeah," she replied with a low voice, "but now I'm just starting to mess with guys. I'm deciding to have fun with it."<br />
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This conversation, although I tried to brush it off, really didn't sit well in my heart. It was heartbreaking to see a woman who was so broken that she was dulling the pain by "just having fun now".<br />
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When I woke up this morning, God brought this lady to mind once more, and it occurred to me that she needs to be introduced to a man who is all she's ever hoped for.<br />
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That man is Jesus.<br />
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I've been the girl who's wanted a guy to fill the deepest longings of my heart before. When I was younger, I thought that if I had a boyfriend, I'd no longer be lonely. I'd have someone who'd take all my cares away. We'd live this perfect life together, and he'd never make a mistake.<br />
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This is the picture I had in my mind, but something was made apparent to me as I started growing up more. I realized that even the best guy can never fill the deepest longings of my heart.<br />
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You see, I believe that God created us with a God-shaped hole in our hearts that longs to be filled (and quite honestly needs to be filled). The problem is that sometimes we try to fill this God-shaped hole with things that were never intended to fill it. I always thought a relationship with another human being could satisfy that longing. Some think that wealth or popularity or any other thing the world has to offer will satisfy it. The truth is, though, that only God can satisfy that hole in our hearts. It was put there just for Him.<br />
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I still have days that I get my priorities out-of-whack and once more I begin trying to satisfy that God-shaped hole with things other than God. However, God has grown me a lot and at least brings it to my attention when I start doing this again.<br />
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I do long for constant connection, but obviously another human being can never give me that. People have more responsibilities than simply me. There's work, other relationships, church, hobbies, this thing called LIFE, and they can't be my God.<br />
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However, let me tell you about a man who is all I've ever hoped for. His name is Jesus.<br />
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Jesus is with me always. He never fails or abandons me. He is my provider, my protector, and my vindicator. He knows what I'm thinking. He understands me (that truly blows me away, because I don't even understand me). Jesus already has loved me with the greatest love by laying His life down for me. He will never reject me, and every tear I cry, He holds in His hands. He's my comforter, my healer, and my love.<br />
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Ladies, the perfect guy we have always dreamed of I believe we sometimes try to find here on earth in human flesh. Let me share something with you... there isn't a perfect guy here on earth in human flesh. Guess what, there isn't a perfect woman here on earth in human flesh either. If a guy is looking for a perfect girl, I'll be alone forever because let me tell you... I'm a mess. However, Jesus thought I was worth dying for.<br />
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I almost wanted to write a devotional titled "Let Your Man Off The Hook", but this title fit a little better. However, do take the advice of that title, and let your man off the hook by no longer expecting him to fill that God-shaped hole he was never meant to fill. As long as you try to do that, you'll drain the life out of him and yourself.<br />
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Contrary to the woman's story where she feels she's never met a nice guy, I feel I've met the nicest guy this side of heaven. Even though that's the case, I still need to make sure I don't try to make him fill that God-shaped hole in my heart. Only when God is filling that place will we be able to enjoy the people He's put in our lives as blessings... not as "gods".<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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You began stirring this devotional in my heart this morning as I thought about the conversation I shared with a lady yesterday. It was a reminder to me that only You can satisfy those deepest longings in my heart, and it's not fair for me to place those expectations on another person. Thank You, Lord, for creating me with a God-shaped hole that draws me to You. Please fill me up so much with You that I can pour Your love onto others rather than draining the life out of them in the desperate search for satisfaction. I pray this lady I shared about will meet You... the man who is all she's ever hoped for. In Jesus' Name. Amen.<br />
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<br />God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-86618730273943239652015-04-09T10:04:00.000-07:002015-04-09T10:12:02.552-07:00Chosen<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Ephesians 1:4-5, "Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure."<br />
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I am reminded today of how we used to pick teams for games when we had a large group of people. There were two team captains and then a line of multiple people whom the captains could choose from to be on their team. The first captain would choose who he wanted and then the next, and they'd rotate back and forth until every person had been placed on a team. You knew the people who would be chosen first, but the sad part was when there were only two people left and one of them was going to end up on a team feeling as if they were there simply because there were no more people to choose from. You never wanted to be chosen last.<br />
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I never liked picking teams that way because there had to be that last person standing there who felt unwanted... unneeded... not chosen.<br />
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Deep down in each of our hearts I believe we all have a longing to be chosen. There's this belief that some of us have that if we could just be smart enough... pretty enough... rich enough... cool enough... popular enough... that somehow we'd then be worthy of being chosen by those we feel rejected by.<br />
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God's dealt with my heart so much in this area over the past few years, but I can remember so clearly the years I went through of just longing to be wanted and to measure up to some standard I thought in my mind I needed to measure up to in order to be chosen. I was so insecure about myself! I felt like no guy out there was interested in me. In my mind, I bought into the lie that if I was just skinny enough, then I'd be wanted. So, I starved myself and went through two years of anorexia in Jr. High. I'd faced rejection (that really turned out being God's protection), and because of feeling rejected, I thought surely there was something wrong with me. I felt like I wasn't enough.<br />
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Then I went to college for a semester, and that's where God began revealing to me who I am in Christ and that I have so much worth and value, not because of who I am but because of Whose I am.<br />
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Last night, I was reading in
Beth Moore's Bible study "Living Beyond Yourself". I was instructed to read Ephesians 1:3-6. Verses 4-5 talk about how God chose us even before the world was made. Then God started stirring this devotional in my heart.<br />
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He <b>CHOSE</b> me. Not only did He choose me. I was <b>CHOSEN</b> even before the world began.<br />
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Later in the Bible study, I read Deuteronomy 7:6 which says, "For you are a holy people, who belong to the Lord your God. Of all the people on earth, the Lord your God has chosen you to be his own special treasure."<br />
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Coming from a girl who grew up with massive low self-esteem from my own insecurities, these verses spoke volumes to me. The words "chosen" and "special treasure" definitely are what I long to be described as.<br />
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Something God taught me as I spent many hours alone while I was in college is that I like who He made me to be. I certainly don't like everything I do, and I don't like who I am in and of myself. However, I do like who I am IN CHRIST. Instead of being my worst enemy, I enjoy my own company now. Instead of constantly needing someone else to keep me propped up emotionally, I now have the confidence that God chose me, and therefore, I am chosen, wanted, and Someone's special treasure.<br />
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There's something I learned from my insecure years. No matter how much people accept me, if I don't learn who I am in Christ, I will never be secure. People weren't the reason I was insecure. In fact, there were many people who told me really encouraging and nice things while I was growing up, but I didn't believe them. If we look for our security in another's opinion of us, we'll go through our entire life trying to measure up. On the other hand, if we will find our security, worth, and value in what our Heavenly Father has to say about us, no matter what others say or do or think about us, we'll have our firm footing on the solid Rock of Christ.<br />
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Know today that no matter what people have accepted or rejected you in life, God chose you. You are chosen by the Creator Himself. Guess what! He even chose you before the world was made, and He knew exactly every good and bad thing you'd ever do. He still chose you.<br />
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Live as a chosen child of God.<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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You know the struggles I've faced in this area of simply wanting to be chosen. Due to that deep desire that I was trying to have filled by people rather than by You, the pain of rejection was excruciating. There were times I bought into the enemy's lies that if I were just pretty enough, funny enough, skinny enough, or some other enough that I'd be worthy of being chosen. Thank You for choosing me knowing full well everything I'd ever do... every success and every mistake. I pray for anyone else who's been caught in this trap of not feeling chosen that You'll begin to show them just how much of a special treasure they are to You and the worth they have in You. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-73334138834050388232015-03-24T02:22:00.001-07:002015-03-24T02:34:13.200-07:00Who Do You Say That I Am?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Matthew 16:13-15 AMP, "Now when Jesus went into the region of Caesarea Philippi, He asked His disciples, Who do people say that the Son of Man is? And they answered, Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and others Jeremiah or one of the prophets. He said to them, But who do you [yourselves] say that I am?"<br />
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In most of my devotionals, I share a lot about my life and what God is doing in it. However, tonight the message that is on my heart to share with you is the simple message of the Gospel. In a culture where information about Christ and about the Christian faith is readily available, I sometimes forget the condition our culture is in Spiritually where people really need to hear not about another religion but rather about something much more personal. That is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.<br />
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In Matthew 16, Jesus asked His disciples this simple question: "Who do people say that the Son of Man is?" They replied telling Him what different people said about Him, but there was a more personal question Jesus wanted to get to with His disciples: "But who do you [yourselves] say that I am?"<br />
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This verse imparticular has stood out to me before as it continues to today. What I see through this conversation Jesus had with His disciples is that we eventually have to come face to face with the same question and answer honestly. It may be tempting to say, "My mom says You're the Savior of the world." "My friends say You're someone they believe is a part of a religion and You're optional." "My professor says You don't exist." I can hear Jesus asking you the question now: "But who do you [yourselves] say that I am?"<br />
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Everything about Jesus is personal. He isn't a form of religion where you follow a list of rules that say, "Thou shalt not..." or "Thou shalt..." He isn't someone Who lived and died and that was the end. According to the Bible, He is the Name that is above every name. He is the first and the last, the beginning and the end. He was born of a virgin, died a sinner's death on a cross although He never sinned once in His life, and after three days, He rose again. Through Him is the only way to Heaven, and He is asking you today, "But who do you say that I am?"<br />
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Tolerance is something that our culture is pushing for right now. The motto of America has become, "What's right for you may not be right for me. You do your thing, and I'll do mine." People are getting to the point that they don't even see there being any absolute truth, and they allow their own feelings and reasoning to be their God.<br />
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I'm not here today to tell you what to believe. I'm here to ask you, "Who do you say that Jesus is?"<br />
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I'm frightened by two responses I hear from people in response to this question. Those responses are: "I'm a good person." and "I believe in God... I believe He exists." The reason why those two responses scare me is because neither of those answers are enough. There are some really good people who won't be in Heaven because getting to Heaven can't be accomplished by being a good person. If it were enough, Jesus wouldn't have had to die and rise again. James 2:19 AMP says, "You believe that God is one; you do well. So do the demons believe and shudder [in terror and horror such as make a man's hair stand on end and contract the surface of his skin]!" Believing He exists isn't enough. Matthew 7:21-23 AMP says, "Not everyone who says to Me, Lord, Lord, will enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father Who is in heaven. Many will say to Me on that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name and driven out demons in Your name and done many mighty works in Your name? And then I will say to them openly (publicly), I never knew you; depart from Me, you who act wickedly [disregarding my commands]."<br />
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"What is the way to that personal relationship with Jesus where I can spend now and forever more with Him, then?" you ask. Here's the good part. John 14:6 AMP says, "Jesus said to him, I am the Way and the Truth and the Life; no one comes to the Father except by (through) Me." Romans 10:9 AMP says, "Because if you acknowledge and confess with your lips that Jesus is Lord and in your heart believe (adhere to, trust in, and rely on the truth) that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved."<br />
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This devotional isn't one I'm sharing out of my own personal opinions (although it is what I believe to be true). Everything I've shared with you today is based off of what the Bible says. However, you personally still must answer the question for yourself: "But who do you say that I am?" It comes down to faith. I hope your response will be like that of Simon Peters in Matthew 16:16 AMP, "Simon Peter replied, You are the Christ, the Son of the living God."<br />
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Dear Jesus,<br />
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This devotional is deep. It's personal, and it requires an honest and very personal answer to the question, "Who do you say that I am?" Your Word makes it clear that You are the only way to Heaven. It shows us that no amount of good works or believing that You exist will be enough. Only through faith in You as our personal Lord and Savior is enough. I pray You'll be tugging on people's hearts through the words You gave me to share tonight. Thank You that You are a God Who never forces Yourself on us but constantly invites us to have a relationship with You. You are so good! I pray all this in Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-10712903227248985192015-03-06T10:31:00.000-08:002015-03-06T10:37:25.893-08:00Do Your PartJohn 5:1-5, "Afterward Jesus returned to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish holy days. Inside the city, near the Sheep Gate, was the pool of Bethesda, with five covered porches. Crowds of sick people -blind, lame, or paralyzed- lay on the porches. One of the men lying there had been sick for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him and knew he had been ill for a long time, he asked him, 'Would you like to get well?'"<br />
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Has there ever been something in your life that you've prayed about for a long time, but nothing seems to be happening?<br />
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Today, I'm going to share with you something that God actually spoke to me through a kid's movie. Yes, you heard me right. I said that God taught me something through a kid's movie. Have you ever seen the movie "Despicable Me 2"? If you haven't, I'm going to be ruining part of it for you today.<br />
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I tried really hard to find the video clip that portrays this moment, but I can't find it. Instead, I'm going to describe it to you.<br />
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There is a scene in this movie where Gru (the father) is very sad because the person he likes (Lucy) is moving away. His youngest daughter (Agnes) meets Gru outside in the rain, and Gru shares with Agnes that she was right about him liking Lucy but now she is moving away. Agnes asks, "Is there anything I can do to help?" Gru tells her, "I don't think so, Sweetheart." Then she asks a different question, "Is there anything you can do?"<br />
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Right now, you may be thinking, "How on earth did you get a devotional out of this?" Just stay with me a minute.<br />
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As I pondered that question, "Is there anything you can do?" God brought it to my attention that so often I pray for Him to intervene in my life, but I expect Him to have those answers magically fall into my lap rather than me at least doing my part and looking for opportunities that God is presenting me with to have those prayers answered.<br />
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I'll give you an example that will show what I'm talking about. For years and years I've been praying that God would put the man I'm going to marry into my life. I've got on my knees, cried multiple tears, and continued to wait for the day that some mystery man walks into my life and asks me to be his wife.<br />
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The problem is this: I come across as extremely unavailable and uninterested... especially to the guys I'm actually interested in. I wear my purity ring that looks like an engagement ring. If there is a prospective guy, instead of talking to him, I'll ignore him out of fear of rejection. I put up this defense mechanism out of my own insecurities and miss the opportunities God does place in my life to even get to know young, godly, stable Christian men.<br />
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Let me clarify what I am NOT saying. I'm not saying that I should be going and pursuing these guys. I completely believe that guys are to be the pursuers. I'm not saying that I need to take situations into my hands and manipulate to get my way. I'm also not saying that I need to be flirty and try to get these guys attention.<br />
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What I'm saying is that when I pray for God to put a godly man into my life and someone happens to come along who is single, godly, and prospective not only in my eyes but also in God's eyes, I should at least not act like I hate the guy in an attempt to protect my heart.<br />
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There is a sermon where Joyce Meyer shares about the man in the verse I wrote at the beginning of this devotional. She talks about how this man who laid on the porch at the pool of Bethesda was there for 38 years, but he laid there all that time waiting for someone else to put him in the pool. Although he may not have been able to do a lot, she says that in 38 years, he could've done a lot of wiggling to make it over to that pool. When Jesus walked by this man, He asked him a question that almost sounds silly, "Would you like to get well?" My first response to that would be sarcasm. "Oh, no, I think I'd like to lay here another 38 years." Through Joyce Meyer's sermon, however, I see the reason behind why Jesus would've asked that question. The man was there for such a long time. If he really wanted to get well, wouldn't it seem like he would've at least done what he could to make it over to the pool?<br />
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That question is a question I believe I'm wrestling with in my own heart today. I can imagine Jesus asking me, "Taylor, you've been praying about having Me put a godly man in your life to marry for years. Do you really want a godly man in your life?"<br />
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It's easy to point fingers and come up with all the excuses as to why it's not my fault I'm still in this situation just as it was easy for the man at the pool of Bethesda to cry, "No one will put me in."<br />
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My cries look a little different: "No one serving You has asked me out, and I don't agree with girls being the pursuer." "I don't want to be rejected." "They seem to like someone else anyway." On and on I go with the list of excuses, and God lays on my heart, "Is what you're praying for really what you want?" Uh, YEAH!<br />
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This is what I believe God is showing me about my situation: Do your part.<br />
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How do I believe God wants me to do my part? Stop giving off every impression that I'm unavailable and uninterested. No, I don't believe I'm supposed to be a flirt, but saying hi to someone next to me and striking up a conversation I don't believe is going to kill me. Keeping my commitment to purity but not wearing a ring that makes it look as if I'm engaged could probably help too.<br />
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What is God asking you to do your part in? It could be in any number of things. Do you really want to get out of debt? Do you really want to be healthier? Do you really want a deeper relationship with God?<br />
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Here's the word for today: Do your part.<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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It's amazing to me the things You'll use to get my attention, including children's movies. Lord, I don't want to go to the extreme of taking matters into my own hands and being manipulative, but I do want to make sure I'm doing my part when it comes to the things I'm praying about in my life. Help me have a healthy balance between allowing You to be leading me and me still doing my part when You present opportunities in my life. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1248685198168438482.post-34741728170186270172015-03-02T21:44:00.001-08:002015-03-02T22:06:18.108-08:00Titles That Define You<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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1 Samuel 4:21, "She named the child Ichabod (which means 'Where is the glory?'), for she said, 'Israel's glory is gone.' She named him this because the Ark of God had been captured and because her father-in-law and husband were dead."<br />
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I recently heard a sermon (I believe it was by Jentezen Franklin) which talked about how Ichabod's mother gave him this name based on where she was at presently in her life. She allowed where she was at in this particular season to be what she would name her son after. Can you imagine having a name which means "Where is the glory?" or "The glory has departed."?<br />
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I'm not sure if you've noticed this before or not, but the Bible places a large emphasis on names and what names mean. God changed Abram's name to Abraham and Sarai's name to Sarah. In Daniel, we see that Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah all were given different names by the chief of staff. They now were called Belteshazzar, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. If you look up the meaning to these names, you'd be amazed at the difference in meanings.<br />
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As I've pondered the different names and the emphasis placed on them in the Bible, God has brought this thought to my mind: What titles define me?<br />
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I don't know what the name "Taylor" means in different languages, but my actual name isn't really the title I'm talking about. The bigger question I'd like to ask myself is this: What titles have I allowed to define me in life?<br />
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When I was growing up, I was really quiet around people that weren't in my immediate family. At church, most of the people viewed me as the quiet, church girl. I went to the same church for years, but most of the people were shocked to really hear me talk.<br />
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This devotional has been one I've been wanting to write for some time now. I wanted to hit on a title that I gave myself for a time that I realized I needed to break free from and not allow that title to define me anymore. That title is "the girl who almost got engaged".<br />
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For the last year and half, when people see my purity ring and ask if I'm engaged, many times I've answered this way: "No, that's just my purity ring. I almost got engaged, but it didn't work out." For whatever reason, instead of simply telling people it's a purity ring, I'd include that little extra information and allowed that moment in my life to define part of me. Something that was simply a season in my life was something I was now naming myself after. I began allowing a season to become my identity.<br />
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Why did I feel that needed to define me?<br />
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I know that season in my life was something that was a big deal to me. When things didn't work out, I saw my situation as being a failure and the end of the story instead of seeing it as being a stepping stone into the life God still had/has ahead for me. Something needed to change in the way I defined myself. I needed a title change.<br />
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Whatever titles we place on ourselves we need to make sure line up with what God says about us. We may have failed, but that does not give us reason to title ourselves as failures. We may have gone through a discouraging season, but that doesn't mean that we are a lost cause.<br />
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If I actually take the time to think about what titles God gives me instead of titling myself after situations and circumstances, these come to mind: Forgiven, pure, restored, redeemed, wanted, cherished, chosen, loved.<br />
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Is there a title that you've claimed as your identity? <br />
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I believe 2 Corinthians 5:17 has the answer to our identity crisis. It says, "This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!"<br />
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Whatever things have happened in your past don't have to label your future. If you're in a really bad season, you don't need to name your child after that. What does God say about you? His title for you is the only one that matters, and I guarantee He desires to call you His beloved child. Let what He says define you... not a season in time.<br />
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Dear Heavenly Father,<br />
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I found myself being much like Ichabod's mother. I gave myself a title based on a season in my life rather than on what You say about me. Sometimes it's easy to take something painful and make it into a title instead of into a stepping stone. Help me only identify myself with what You say to be true about me. Let all the other titles I'm tempted to allow to define me be demolished. In Jesus' Name.<br />
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Amen.God's Girlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15933509363904046811noreply@blogger.com0